


I'm Not Over You

by Shizaya143



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-17
Updated: 2018-09-05
Packaged: 2018-11-01 18:04:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10927146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shizaya143/pseuds/Shizaya143
Summary: Oikawa was over him, completely and totally over him, or at least that was what he liked to tell himself. That's what made it easier for him to stand there and watch his ex-boyfriend make out with a handsome brunette."You okay with that?" He heard Kuroo ask from beside him, handing him a beer. Oikawa rolled his eyes and took another look at the couple."It's not like they're serious." He said as he lifted the drink to his lips. "They're just fucking."





	1. Chapter 1

Iwaizumi yawned as he opened his eyes to the morning sun shining through the curtain of his apartment window. He shifted his gaze and smiled as he caught the sight of the brunette half naked in his bed, soundly asleep. Life was good, to put it simply.

At twenty-four, Hajime was in his last semester of university, working towards graduating in the spring and was also in steady relationship with someone he truly cared for. What more could he ask for? Sure, he’d had his struggles getting through school and second guessing if he truly wanted to be a physiotherapist but it had worked out in the end. For the most part he had payed for his tuition by picking up odd jobs when he had had the chance and was lucky enough to be graduating with very little debt. As for his relationship, he was happy. Whether they were spending time or sleeping together he enjoyed being in the others presence. Not to mention the sex was mind blowing.

All in all he had no reason to complain about his life.

The only thing that bothered him from time to time was his past. There were things he regretted, things he looked back on and wondered why he had been so naïve and most importantly people he had trusted that had not hesitated to stab him in the back. Iwaizumi only guessed that was how people were. Some were too selfish to care about who they played around with to get what they wanted.

He was snapped out of his inner musings when his boyfriend shifted in his sleep, the soft brown locks brushing against his chest as he slowly opening his eyes to smile up at Iwaizumi.

“Morning babe.” The soft voice said and Hajime leaned down to place a kiss on his lover’s forehead.

“Morning.” He responded, feeling a thin arm wrap around his naked torso.

“Hmm, last night was good.” Came the teasing voice, and Hajime slowly smirked as he watched his lover climb into his lap, straddling his waist as kisses were peppered along his chest. “Let me repay you?”

Before he knew it, the sexy brunette was in front of him, on his knees, pulling at the waistline of his boxers and stroking at his cock. “You’re so damn big, Hajime.”

“Hm.” The raven hummed in approval as his dick was engulfed in the warm mouth of his lover.

“Fuck yes, right there Misaki.”

* * *

 The ball slammed into the back wall of the gym, echoing as it bounced off the cement and rolled to a stop in front of the net. “Sorry, that was long.”

“Oh ho, is someone in a pissy mood today?” A raven asked as he picked up the ball and walked over to the server.

“Fuck off Tetsu-chan.” Oikawa snapped as he grabbed the ball out of his teammates hands. It was too damn early to be in the school gym on a Saturday. Sure, scouts were coming from the national team in a few weeks, and sure if Oikawa didn’t snag a spot he would only have his degree in science to fall back on, but that didn’t mean he had to suffer being stuck in a gym with fucking Kuroo Tetsurou and his other teammates on a weekend.

“Maybe you should get laid or something?” Kuroo continued, unfazed by Oikawa’s words. The two of them had become quite close over their years in collage together and although they could tolerate one another, Kuroo had taken a liking to annoying Oikawa every chance he got.

“Oh, relationship advice from the man that can’t settle down?” The brunette spat, winding up for another practice serve, this time successfully sinking it in the far right on the other side.

“You know I’m not the type to settle down, besides you could find someone willing to fuck your brains out in a second.” Kuroo said, smirking widely as Oikawa frowned at him and laughing as he dodged the ball aimed at him seconds later. “I’m just wondering why you haven’t found anyone yet.”

“The same reason why I was dumped in high school, volleyball is all I have time for.” He stated, walking over to the bench and grabbing his water bottle. He ignored the eye roll he received from his friend or the quiet ‘bullshit’ that was said under the man’s breath. No, he wasn’t being honest with being unable to maintain a relationship.

He had done it before. For years in fact. But considering he was twenty-four and still single it was safe to say the relationship hadn’t lasted.

He turned to speak once again but was interrupted by an obnoxiously loud yell from the entrance of the gym. Oikawa knew who it was before he, and the rest of his teammates who were littered around gym, turned to take in the sight.

“Oh ho ho, good morning!” The voice said as he ran towards the raven next to Oikawa. Once he was within a few meters of them he spoke again. “Good to see you bro.”

“I’m surprised you made it Bo.” Kuro said, smirking as he noticed the obvious bags under his friend’s eyes.

Bokuto , former captain of Fukurodani, was now the current ace of Tokyo University’s volleyball team. Oikawa admired the man for his talent and sheer enthusiasm for the game and although he could be overbearing at times, he was a good player.

They were number one in the country after all.

“Akaashi woke me up this morning. He said that he was heading to the library to study for midterms.”

Kuroo nodded and wrapped one of his arms around Bokuto’s shoulders, leading him towards to court to start his warm up. They were annoying, but good friends if Oikawa was being honest. Surprisingly they had had his back more than once throughout his collage life and he was grateful for that. He was also happy to have met great friends through those idiots, namely Akaashi and Sugawara. It was a long story but through repeated meet ups with the two setters they had formed a pleasant friendship.

Akaashi was quiet and liked to keep to himself, but he was there for Oikawa when he needed him. He wasn’t like the Bokuto or Kuroo who couldn’t keep a serious conversation longer than five minutes. No, he was pleasant to talk to and on more than one occasion had helped him with homework, despite being a year younger than him. The raven was aiming for a degree in health science, specifically to attend medical school and become a neurologist and Oikawa wondered if it was fair to be both pretty and smart. It wasn’t like he was saying he wasn’t either of those two, but his passions had never been that high.

Or least that’s what he told himself. It was obvious from an on lookers point of view he probably had it all. A full scholarship to one of the best Universities’ in the country, a degree in general sciences and a prospect for the upcoming year of picks for the national team. Not to mention he was good looking.

Many people probably envied his position. But when he was alone and left to contemplate what he was going to do with his life, he became scared.

Would anyone be by his side once his career was over? Sure, he was happy about his bright future but he had always believed when he was standing at this point of his life he would have someone with him to hold his hand and tell him everything would be alright.

One person in particular.

How stupid to think that he had been too afraid to get hurt that he let everything slip through his fingers. He had regrets, but still held onto that false hope that one day he would open the door to his apartment and see the man he had loved, was still in love with, standing there. He had hoped that he would be given one more chance, but that wasn’t the type of man he was. Iwaizumi had always been head strong and honest with himself and Oikawa knew there was a reason why he never came back.

It had been a year since the break up and as much as Oikawa had regrets, his biggest one was staring Hajime in the eye and saying. “Yeah, I agree maybe we should.” when the raven had suggested a break.

 

* * *

Oikawa was snapped out of his thoughts by a ball hitting him in the back of his head, almost knocking him over. He heard a faint “oops” from Bokuto behind him and quiet snickers from Kuroo, probably trying to contain his laughter.

He stormed over to where the ball had landed and picked it up. There was no point dwelling on the past. Besides, volleyball had always been a fantastic stress reliever.

“Why don’t we play a little scrimmage.” He announced to the few players on the benches. “Bokuto and Kuroo can be on the other team.”

* * *

 Iwaizumi had finally gotten out of bed around noon, grateful that he had the day off from work considering he really needed to finish a lab report he had pushed off until the weekend. He was usually surprisingly good about finishing homework early but in the past week Misaki had dragged him to bed every chance he had gotten and the raven didn’t have it in him to refuse.

“Hmm, you heading to campus today?” The shorter man asked, walking out of his room wearing nothing but one of Hajime’s old shirts. The shirt easily fell to the brunette’s thighs, barely covering his ass and Iwaizumi couldn’t help but slightly blush at the sight. It wasn’t the first time Misaki had sported one of his shirts as clothing, but it never ceased to turn the raven on.

“Yeah, I’ll probably be late coming home.” He said as he finished off his coffee and grabbed his backpack.

“Have fun.” Misaki said as he wrapped his arms around Iwaizumi’s neck, pulling him down into a kiss. When they pulled apart he heard a faint, “I love you” whispered in his ear and he pulled his boyfriend into another quick kiss.

“Bye.” He eventually said when he pulled away for the last time. “I’ll text you when I’m done.”

He exited his apartment a few seconds later and immediately headed to elevators at the end of the hall. Iwaizumi had just moved into his apartment less than a month ago when he decided it was best to get a place of his own this year. He was graduating soon and it would be better to live alone. Plus, it made him feel independent, like he didn’t have to rely on anyone, like he had control over his life which was something he hadn’t felt in a long time.

For the latter part of the previous year he had been able to split the rent with Hanamaki and Matsukawa in their apartment. Since the two of them had started dating after they had leased a two-bedroom apartment they had been forced to pay for it. Luckily for Iwaizumi he had convinced his friends to let him borrow the room they were no longer using.

“Wait.” He called as the door to the elevator begun to close and Iwaizumi just barely made it in time to stop it from shutting. The door reopened as his hand blocked it from closing and he stepped inside once he was able to. As he entered the cramped space he finally caught sight of a familiar face he would have been happy if he had never seen again.

“Iwaizumi-san.” The deep monotone voice said. “What a coincidence, it had been a long time.”

“Likewise, Ushijima.” The raven managed as he sized up the stoic man. Nothing had really changed from the last time they had seen each other, which was probably about a year ago. He was still as expressionless and emotionless as ever.

The door closed a few seconds later, leaving the pair to awkwardly wait as they descended to the main floor.

“You live here?” Iwaizumi asked finally, wondering why the man would be here in the first place. He had his theories, one would be he was visiting someone and the other was that he lived there. He hoped it was the former.

“Yes, I recently moved in.” He nodded. “I’m assuming you do as well?”

“Yeah.” He answered.

They stayed silent for the rest of the ride down, which was relatively short, but nonetheless Iwaizumi would’ve preferred to take the stairs. Despite himself, he exited the elevator when it opened and politely followed alongside Ushijima until they were in front of the apartment complex. The place was close enough to the university that Iwaizumi was able to walk, which was good considering he didn’t own a car.

“Are you planning on heading to school?” Ushijima’s deep voice asked from beside him, and Iwaizumi wondered why the other hadn’t left already. Turning his head slightly, the raven nodded as he pulled out his phone to check his messages. He frowned as he noticed the date on the lock screen, but pushed the thoughts out of his head and unlocked the phone.

He had received a few texts, one from his lab partner that had suggested doing the lab report together later in the afternoon. He quickly replied to her as he responded to the man beside him. “Yeah, I have a lab due soon. You?”

“I’m visiting the team.”

Short and to the point as always.

Iwaizumi sighed, nodding slightly as he turned his body in the direction of campus.

“If you are interested you should come visit.” The ace of the national team offered and Iwaizumi wondered if the man was doing it out of kindness or if he was just that oblivious. Nonetheless he waved off the offer, adding “I’m a little busy today.”

“See you around.” He said a few seconds later and immediately turned to walk towards the large campus.

Life was good. Or at least that’s what Iwaizumi liked to tell himself anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

Oikawa sighed as he walked out of the locker room after the long day. He frowned a little when he passed a few players who were surrounding his former teammate and new starter of the national team, Ushijima Wakatoshi.

“Hey, you heading home?” Kuroo asked from where he was waiting near the entrance of the gym. He followed Oikawa’s glare to see it was directed at their team’s former ace and sighed. “Or are you going to glare at him all day. I figured you’d warm up to him after a few years. Didn’t you guys get along before he left the team last year?”

“That’s not funny, Tetsu-chan.” He said, rolling his eyes at the teasing smirk coming from the raven. “And no, I have to study for a bit. I need to work ahead so I don’t fall behind in my classes.” Oikawa answered.

It wasn’t like he was the best student out there, far from it, but Oikawa knew if he didn’t do it, no one would be there to remind him to stay on top of his school work. Plus, if he didn’t keep his grades up he wouldn’t be able to keep his sports scholarship.

“I think I’m going to head to the general library before it closes.” He said. “I should be able to get a few hours of studying in.”

Kuroo nodded, muttering “I don’t know how you do it.” Before he exited the building and walked to his parked car. The two volleyball players said their goodbyes before heading their separate ways.

It was a little past two o’clock and Oikawa slightly wondered if there would be any seats left on the main floor of the library. He rarely stayed at school after classes or practice, as he preferred to study in the comfort of his apartment, but whenever he did he knew there would be a sizable number of students that liked to cram at the library. He just hoped he’d be able to find a quiet spot to get a few solid hours of work in.

Eventually, Oikawa arrived at his destination and made his way into the large general library. The main floor was for group study where students could openly discuss with one another and if a student wanted a quieter study area they would have to head to the higher floors, the higher they went the quieter it got. The brunette wasted no time to walk over to the elevator and make his way up to the second floor. He exited to see students scattered around tables and cubicles quietly talking to one another. The noise level was significantly lower up here and Oikawa preferred it this way.

He begun to scan the large study area to see if there were any spots open, knowing it would be hard to find one considering midterms were right around the corner. Most people opted to get work done when deadlines were fast approaching and what better place to do it than the library? From his experience, it was always better to have people to study with, especially if they actually knew the material.

After a few minutes of looking around he noticed an open spot next to small petite girl who seemed to be typing away on her laptop, focused on whatever she was working on. Smiling, Oikawa approached the girl, leaning down to tap her on her shoulder to her attention.

“Is this seat taken?” He whispered and the raven shook her head.

Nodding, he took the spot and pulled out his laptop from his backpack. The cubicles were large enough for him to spread out his belongings, however they were close enough together that Oikawa could see what the girl was working on. From what he could tell it was a lab report for a science course and he almost pitied her as he recalled the endless number of labs he’d have to go through in his earlier years.

Turning his head back to his laptop screen, he leaned back in the chair as he waited for the computer to boot up. He took the time to check his phone, replying to both Kuroo and Bokuto to tell them he didn’t want to go out tonight. He also texted Sugawara asking him if he was on campus. Much like his relationship with Akaashi, he had become relatively good friends with the silver-haired man after a few years of university together. Despite his soft-spoken demeanor and kind smile, Oikawa had learned throughout the years that the boy had quite a sly personality, which was probably why they got along so well despite what others might think.

“Hey, I didn’t know you studied here.” Oikawa heard someone say from behind him and turned his head to see a guy from one of his classes towering over him.

He recognized him as Kitamoto Takashi, a kid that he had met at the beginning of the semester when they coincidently sat together in his physiology class. They weren’t particularly close, but did talk before and after lectures and had even exchanged numbers in case one of them ended up a missing class and needed notes. For the most part they were friendly, however Tooru would call them acquaintances more than anything.

“Yeah, I just got here.” He said as he politely smiled at the boy. He placed his phone on the table as he turned his body to speak with his classmate.

“Really? I actually have a question about last lecture, if you don’t mind me asking…” Kitamoto asked, “But if you’re busy it’s fine I could text you about it later.”

Oikawa shook his head in response, gesturing to the extra spot next to him as he spoke again. “It’s fine, our midterm’s coming up soon and it’d probably help me if I reviewed for a bit.”

“Thanks man.” Kitamoto said as he sat down in the spot to Tooru’s left.

It didn’t take too long before they were quietly going over past midterms on his computer and discussing the answers. It wasn’t until they had finished the first of many practice midterms did the pair take a break.

“Damn, I’m so screwed for this.” His classmate said and Oikawa looked over to see the man slump back onto his chair.

If he was being completely honest his new friend was quite good looking, with his dark brown hair and handsome face that would surely turn a few heads. The volleyball player figured he was popular with the opposite sex.

“Did you find the source?” He heard a voice ask and Oikawa was suddenly pulled from his thoughts as he supressed the urge to turn his head in the direction of the question. He paused for a moment as he processed the words, clearly understanding they weren’t directed towards him.

Despite that, he knew who was speaking, could probably pick out the voice easily from a crowd, however somehow it felt unfamiliar to him. Maybe it was because he hadn’t heard it awhile, but nonetheless it sounded almost foreign to him.

“No, I’ve been searching for awhile now.” The girl next to Oikawa said with a sigh.

“It’s fine, we’re almost done, we’ll finish it.” The voice said.

“Hey, you free tonight?” Kitamoto suddenly asked and Oikawa’s attention was drawn back to the man next to him, he let out a small chuckle as he answered.

“Yeah, I am.” Oikawa said as he subconsciously felt a pair of eyes on him, although he wasn’t sure if that was just in his head. “What is it?”

“Wanna come over and cram for our midterm together? I seriously don’t understand the difference between smooth and cardiac muscle contractions?”

He paused for a moment, giving the offer some thought before he decided it wouldn’t be the worst thing to do on a Saturday night.

“Sure, I’ve got nothing better to do.” Oikawa said with a sigh. Quickly adding, “Not that I don’t enjoy your company.”

“No, its fine. I’d rather be getting wasted tonight instead of studying, but this midterm is worth thirty-five percent of our grade and considering I know a third off what he’s taught us it’s safe to say that I’m gonna fail if I don’t at least cram.” Kitamoto said before he leaned forward and flipped through his notes again. Oikawa silently watched the boy shuffle through the papers, before he landed on the page he wanted, pointing to a diagram he spoke again.

“In smooth muscles, does the majority of the calcium come from the extracellular space? Or is it already in the cell?” Leaning forward, the volleyball player examined the diagram before he begun to explain it, trying to clarify things for his hopeless new friend.

He tried his best to ignore the man a few seats away, knowing that Iwaizumi must’ve at least noticed him by now. They hadn’t spoken to each other, much less see one another in over six months and Oikawa felt uneasy as he continued to help Kitamoto. He’d heard a few things about his ex-boyfriend throughout the months, mostly through Makki and Matsun, but hadn’t kept in touch with Iwaizumi after the break up.

It was to be expected really, considering the way they broke things off, but it still felt odd hearing about Iwaizumi’s life as if he was some stranger. Nonetheless, Oikawa was glad to hear his former lover was doing well, with his new apartment and his plans to graduate this semester, it brought a bitter sweet smile to his face.

He’d also heard quiet murmurs about Iwaizumi having a lover, but Oikawa didn’t bother to ask his friends about the matter. He already knew the answer.

As for himself, he had avoided relationships since the break up and wasn’t planning on starting one anytime soon. Sure, he liked to occasionally go out and get wasted at a club, but he’d never been stupid enough to sleep with a complete stranger, especially when he was drunk. The brunette knew the longer he hesitated to start a new relationship, the longer he would still be hung up on his ex, but he wondered if he really wanted to get over Iwaizumi.

Would he ever find someone that knew him the way Hajime did?

Probably not. But thinking back, Oikawa wondered if Iwaizumi knew how heartbroken he had been when his boyfriend had suggested a break. He never expected that agreeing to it would lead to them avoiding one another to the point where their only contact was through text messages and small sticky notes left on the fridge as a reminder to take out the trash. Sure, they had had their fights in the past but _never_ had Hajime suggested a _break._

 “And once the contraction is over, the calcium exits the cell through antiporters on it’s membrane or is restored into the SR.” Oikawa said as he finished his explanation. There was more to their break up than what Tooru had seen that day, but when Hajime had arrived home late that night it had crushed him.

“Okay, that makes sense.” Kitamoto nodded. “Maybe we should go over another midterm to see if there are any questions that cover this stuff.”

Oikawa turned his body back towards his laptop and pulled up one of the previous midterms, taking the time to quickly glance over to his right to catch a glimpse of the person that had him on edge. The girl next to him blocked some of his view, but Oikawa could see Iwaizumi’s eyes concentrating on something inside his cubicle.

He looked good. However, Tooru didn’t dwell on thought as he turned his attention back to his computer ignoring the painful tug he felt in his chest. Things would never go back to the way they were, not even if he wanted them to.

* * *

 Iwaizumi sighed as he made his way back to his seat. He had been able to finish most of his lab report, with the help of his lab partner, and now all they needed to do was to find a few primary sources.

“Did you find the source?” He asked as he noticed the hopeless look on her face. His guess was probably not.

“No, I’ve been searching for awhile now.” Hinami-san, his lab partner said as he gently placed her head on the table top. He could tell she was close to giving up but they both knew that they were too close to finishing to throw in the towel now.

“It’s fine, we’re almost done, we’ll finish it.” He said reassuringly, but he slightly doubted his words. The worst-case scenario would be that they would have to take the zero for the question they used the source for, but both of them were too stubborn to give up that easily.

“Hey, you free tonight?” Iwaizumi heard, and shifted his attention away from Hinami-san towards a pair that had taken the seats beside them. He didn’t think too much about it until his eyes landed on the man next to his lab partner. He couldn’t see his face, hadn’t even heard his voice, yet he knew who it was just from looking at his back. The broad shoulders and annoyingly styled hair brought back old memories and Iwaizumi frowned as he involuntarily listened to Oikawa’s conversation.

“Yeah, I am.” He heard Tooru say. “What is it?”

His voice sounded the same, yet Iwaizumi knew there was something different about Oikawa. He had changed, they both had, but that was to be expected. He and Tooru had grown up together which was why when everything ended it had taken Iwaizumi some time to get used to not having the others presence around all the time.

“Wanna come over and cram for our midterm together? I seriously don’t understand the difference between smooth and cardiac muscle contractions?” He heard and Iwaizumi knew Oikawa’s friend was probably desperate if he was asking Tooru for help. Nonetheless, the offer brought up unwanted thoughts that Hajime could only label as irrational. Why would it matter if Oikawa spent his night studying at some guy’s place?

“Sure, I’ve got nothing better to do. Not that I don’t enjoy your company.” Hajime resisted the urge to scoff at the comment as he wondered if the two were sleeping together. He wouldn’t put it past Tooru.

Eventually, he pushed his thoughts aside to finish the lab report. He knew the faster he completed it, the faster he could go home. Hajime didn’t need, much less want, Oikawa back in his life now, not after everything that had happened. Besides, he was in a steady relationship and although he couldn’t say he was completely in love with Misaki, he did have strong feelings for him.

As if on que, his phone vibrated in his pocket and he pulled it out to see a message from his boyfriend.

 **[Misaki]:** Hey babe, I know you’re busy with school right now but I was wondering if you’re up for going out tonight?

 **[Iwaizumi]:** What do you have in mind?

 **[Misaki]:** A friend of mine is throwing a party just off campus, he invited us if you’re interested?

 **[Misaki]:** I know you don’t like big parties, but it’d be a good stress reliever. What do you think?

Hajime looked down at his phone, reading over the text before he turned to his left to see Oikawa explaining something to the guy next to him.

 **[Iwaizumi]:** Sure, I’ll be back at my place soon. You still there? We can work out the details once I’m home.

 **[Misaki]:** No, I’m back at my place, I can meet you at your place in a bit. I’ll bring dinner and we can go together.

 **[Iwaizumi]:** Sounds good. I’ll try to finish up here soon.

He put away his phone seconds later as he glanced over to his lab partner who was scrolling through her twitter feed on her computer. They had both given up on trying to find the primary source at this point and Iwaizumi decided it would be better to take a break and revisit the report later. They had done a lot of work for one day and Iwaizumi was feeling a weight lift off his shoulders as he knew he could hand in the report now and still get a relatively good mark.

“Hey, maybe we should call it a day.” He suggested and the girl next to him let out a loud sigh and nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, I don’t think we’re getting anywhere with this question. I’ll message a few of my friends tonight and ask them if they have any of their old lab reports.” She said as she closed her laptop and began neatly putting away her belongings.

“Sounds good.”

Iwaizumi watched as Hinami eventually pulled out her car keys and swung her backpack over her shoulder to leave. “See you later, Iwaizumi-san.”

“Bye.”

The raven watched the girl walk towards the exit before turning his attention back to his laptop. He hadn’t been sure if Oikawa had noticed him yet, but with her farewell he was certain the man had heard his name. There was no longer anyone separating the two of them, and Hajime could now see the side profile of his ex-boyfriend.

He subtly let his eye wonder down Oikawa’s figure and he had to admit, he was still annoyingly good looking. Tooru had the type of beauty anyone could notice by just looking at him and his body was just as impressive, with his lean muscles and smooth skin. When they had been dating, he had to admit he loved to see him unravel underneath him. To see his face flushed, his eyes wide with pleasure and his skin covered in marks.

He frowned at the unwelcomed memories. He was over him. Oikawa meant nothing to him now.

His attention drifted back to his laptop a moment later, saving and closing his lap report before he shifted his focus to an essay he had been working on. Sighing, he opened his web browser and begun looking through peer reviewed journals in hopes of getting some information that supported his thesis. It wasn’t until almost an hour later did he get interrupted by someone calling him.

“Hey, what’s up?” He asked as he answered his phone, his voice a little louder than a whisper. “Why’re you calling?”

“What kind of pizza do you want?” He heard Misaki ask and smiled a bit at the question.

“You decide.”

“Okay, but if you don’t like what I order then don’t complain.”

“Just don’t put any olives.” He advised. “I’m heading home now anyway. See you soon.”

“Alright, sounds good. Love you.”

“Love you too.” He responded out of habit and wasted no time in packing up his things and getting up. He ended the call and turned to walk towards the staircase, not bothering to spare another glance at Oikawa.

If he had, he probably would've seen the heartbroken expression Tooru was trying so desperately to hide. 


	3. Chapter 3

“Hey, you alright?” He heard a voice say, but Oikawa didn’t bother to respond, his emotions running high as he processed the parting words. He was trying his best to compose himself in front of his classmate, although Tooru could tell he was failing miserably. It wasn’t like he hadn’t expected Hajime to move on, to find someone else to love and cherish the way he had done with Tooru, but Oikawa had always pushed it to the back of his mind.

Sure, Iwa-chan sleeping around was something the setter could handle hearing about, even if it usually put him in a bad mood. But moving on? It hadn’t crossed Oikawa’s mind until he overheard Hajime’s phone call. The affectionate voice, the small smile that graced his face as he spoke and the effortless _love you too_ as he hung up the phone were all indications of how much Iwaizumi had fallen for his new lover.

And it bothered Oikawa. It left him feeling like someone had dropped a bucket of cold water on his head as a way of telling him to wake up from his delusional thoughts of getting back together with Hajime. What had he been expecting?

“Hey, if you’re not up for studying tonight it’s fine you know.” He heard the voice say again and this time Oikawa shook his head in response before turning to his classmate with a fake smile.

“No, it’s nothing. I’m just a bit tired after practice today.” He lied already closing his laptop. “I think I’m going to head home and grab some dinner. We can meet up later?”

His friend took a few seconds to process the offer before nodding in agreement. “Sounds good. I’ll text you when I get back to my place. Even if it’s a few hours it’d really help.”

“Alright.” Oikawa said as he begun packing his things into his bag and saying his final farewell to Kitamoto. Once he was outside, he immediately walked towards his parked car that he had left near the gym.

It wasn’t until he was sitting in the car that he finally let out the emotions he had been bottling up. He slammed his hands on the steering wheel in anger, and mostly regret, before he leaned forward and rested his head on it, letting himself cry for the first time in awhile. Oikawa wasn’t sure how long he stayed that way, letting the tears roll down his face and into lap as he replayed the encounter in his head, but eventually he lifted his head and pulled out his phone.

He had never gotten a response from Suga, and he only guessed that was because the former setter was probably busy, however he did get a response from Kuroo.

 **[Tetsu-chan** ] Ohh, come on. I bet all you’ve done today is go to practice and study. When’s the last time you went out? Plus, Akaashi’s gonna drive us home so if you're interested you can get wasted ;)

Oikawa rolled his eyes at his friend’s text. It wasn’t like he didn’t party, he did, although it was mostly when he _didn’t_ have to worry about volleyball and midterms. Nonetheless, he was tempted as he read the last part of the message. It had been awhile since he had actually gotten wasted. That was probably because he never liked the taste of alcohol and he was usually the responsible one of the group. More often than not he was the one driving Bokuto and Kuroo home from their night of fun. Akaashi rarely liked to tag along, considering he was always busy with school and Suga would usually get a ride home with his boyfriend, Sawamura.

 **[Oikawa]** I’ll think about it, I might show up later.

Pulling out his keys, Oikawa finally started the car and pulled out of the parking lot. His place wasn’t too far from the university, but he preferred having the car since practices tended to end late and start early. He was too lazy to walk and hated to wait for a bus after a long day which was why he invested in the car.

He decided it would be better to pick up some food rather than attempt to cook dinner considering he was never the _best_ in the kitchen, and he wasn’t about to try to improve his skills now. Eventually he was fumbling with his keys in front of his apartment door, trying to unlock it without dropping the food and bags in his hands.

“Need help with that?” Oikawa heard and he turned to his left to see a brown-haired man starring at the keys in his hand.

“Ahh…If you don’t mind.” Tooru accepted politely as the guy took the key from him and inserted it into the slot. He also pushed the door open to allow the volleyball player to walk in without dropping the bags.

“Thank you so much.”

“No problem.” Oikawa heard before he finally let the bags drop in the front entrance and shifted his attention back to the stranger, accepting his keys from him. “My name’s Oikawa by the way. Do you live here?”

He never had the chance to get know his neighbours after he had moved in last year summer due to his busy schedule, but he figured most of the tenants were university students and from the looks of things the stranger looked around his age.

“Yeah, right next door.” He said gesturing with his head to the left. “I’ve been living here for a few years now, but I’m usually really busy with school. And my name’s Nakamura.”

“Ughh, same here.” Oikawa nodded in understanding. “And nice to meet you Nakamura-kun. Thanks for the help, I’ll see you around.”

“Bye.” He said with a small smile before he turned to leave. Closing the door a few seconds later Oikawa kicked off his shoes and picked up the bags again as he walked into the kitchen. Although he had been living in his new place for less than a year he had to admit it was convenient. It was close to school, large enough for him to live comfortably and relatively quiet.

His neighbours never played loud music or threw parties and Tooru was grateful for that. He had heard horrible stories of rowdy neighbours that kept some of his friends up late at night which was something he didn’t think he could deal with. Nakamura also seemed liked a pretty good guy which was always a good thing. It never hurt to befriend someone that lived next door, especially considering he was still getting used to living alone.

Oikawa begun to unpack his food and eat as he sat down at the kitchen table. He took the time to also pull out his phone and check his missed messages. There were two.

 **[Tetsu-chan]** Where are you right now?

 **[Oikawa]** Home

 **[Oikawa]** I’m heading out to study with someone for a bit. I’ll probably show up late. Where are you guys going tonight?

 **[Tetsu-chan]** Some party off campus. Akaashi’s friend is throwing it but it looks like its gonna be huge.

 **[Tetsu-chan]** And are you gonna bring the person you’re studying with?

 **[Oikawa]** Should I?

 **[Tetsu-chan]** Up to you and here’s the place

Oikawa read the message before clicking on the link Kuroo included. It showed the location of the house on a map.

 **[Oikawa]** Thanks I’ll see you later

He exited out of his conversation with Kuroo and opened his other new message as he continued to eat. Kitamoto had texted him his address and he immediately replied.

 **[Oikawa]** Thanks what time do you want me to head over?

 **[Kitamoto]** In 30 minutes?

 **[Oikawa]** Alright I’ll be right over

* * *

 

“Okay, that’s all of them.” Kitamoto said as he leaned back on his chair in the kitchen. “I think I’m getting better at this.”

Oikawa nodded as he closed his laptop with a smile, feeling surprisingly accomplished after they finished going over all of the practice midterms. He still needed to do a few more hours of reviewing but for the most part he understood the major points of the material they had been taught.

“You think we should call it a night?” Tooru heard and he quickly checked the time on his phone. It was just after ten thirty and he figured it would be a pretty good time to head over to the party.

“Yeah, I’m done for tonight.” He said before pulling up the message Kuroo had sent earlier and finding the directions to the party from Kitamoto’s place. Thankfully, Kitamoto lived close enough to the university that Oikawa had been able to park his car on the street and walk over to the apartment. He intended to leave his car for the night and have one of his friends give him a ride to it the next day.

 **[Oikawa]** Hey, are you guys there yet?

Once he sent the message Oikawa looked up to his friend and asked. “Are you busy after this?”

“No, why?” Kitamoto asked as he stacked his notes into his backpack and placed it near the table. He lived with a roommate but Tooru had to admit the place looked surprisingly clean for a university student’s apartment.

“I’m heading over to a party right now, wanna come?” He asked, feeling it odd to extend such an offer to a classmate. Aside from studying, he rarely spent time with people from his classes, but he figured Kitamoto probably needed to take a break from all the cramming. Besides, he had been pretty helpful despite all the of questions he asked.

“How many people are going?”

“I’m not sure, a friend of mine invited me but I think it’s gonna be pretty big.” Oikawa replied honestly. He had only been to a few large parties in university, preferring to go to clubs once he was old enough, but they tended to get pretty big sometimes. He never really liked such a large crowd, but he guessed it was something that appealed to single college students looking for a good time.

He inwardly scowled as he recalled all the parties he _had_ attended throughout his university life. Hajime had always been by his side, dancing with him or pulling him into an empty room to continue their make out sessions. He had never been single at one of these parties and it made him feel uneasy at the thought of being back in the dating scene. As much as Oikawa acted like a flirt, he had only been in short relationships in high school before getting together with Iwaizumi. Now that he was single would he know how to act in a serious relationship?

When he and Hajime had started dating their friendship had already been there, which let them skip over getting to know one another. He didn’t have to worry about going on dates or looking good in front of the other because Iwaizumi had already seen him at his worst. He had been there through every set back and problem Tooru had encountered and had given him a push, or punch, when he needed it.

It was terrifying to think he had to start over again with someone else.

“Sure, I’m up for it.” Kitamoto said. “How are you getting there?”

“I drove here but I’m planning on drinking. We could split a cab? It’s a five-minute drive from here.” Oikawa said as he looked at the directions.

“Sounds good.” His classmate said before getting up. “I’ll get ready.”

Nodding, Oikawa pulled up a number for a cab and called it. He wasn’t too excited on going out tonight, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to spend his night alone with his thoughts.  

* * *

 

The cab pulled up in front of the large house around eleven and the two men quickly paid the driver and exited the vehicle. Tooru was dressed in a plain white shirt and basic ripped jeans where as Kitamoto wore a black hoodie and khakis. He pulled his phone out and checked his messages again.

 **[Tetsu-chan]** Yeah, we just arrived.

The message had been sent a few minutes ago. Walking towards house he quickly replied asking Kuroo where he was. Entering the place Oikawa looked around and noticed a few familiar faces but no one he was particularly close with.

“Hey, you said your friends were here? Did you wanna meet up with them?” Kitamoto asked from behind him, as he looked around the place to see if he knew anyone.

“Why don’t we get a drink first?” Oikawa offered as they walked towards the living room where people were standing around talking or dancing to the music playing through the speakers. Scanning the room Oikawa had to admit the turn out of people was pretty decent, although not enough to make it uncomfortable to walk around. In all honestly he didn’t like partying too much, preferring to spend the night wrapped up in a warm blanket and watching the latest episode of whatever show he was interested in at the time, but tonight was different. He was beginning to realize that although everything in his life was looking up at the moment, he still felt something was missing.

It wasn’t hard to figure out what that was. Tooru knew he was kidding himself if he thought he would be able to go about his life without attempting to move on from his previous relationship.

Hajime aside, all of the other relationships he had been in were ones he knew weren’t going to work out in the end. The girls he had dated always wanted something from him, whether that was attention or status, he was nothing more than arm candy to show off. It hadn’t bothered Tooru, considering he hadn’t put his all into those relationships either, but when he started dating Iwaizumi everything changed. They had just known each other to the point where Oikawa didn’t feel like their relationship would ever break apart. Yet it had. And in the months that followed he had buried himself in school and volleyball to get away from the horrible feeling that he hadn’t been enough to make Hajime stay.

Now, almost a year later, he knew he would have to come to terms with reality and close that chapter of his life. Turn over a new leaf and _attempt_ to be happy with someone else. Although, Oikawa knew that was easier said than done.

“I’ll grab us a few beers.” He heard Kitamoto say from behind him and Oikawa nodded in response.

He silently watched as his classmate walked towards the kitchen seconds later, taking the time to linger on his back before turning away. Kitamoto was nice, but Tooru wasn’t stupid enough to start something like _that_ with a classmate. Besides, he didn’t even begin to compare to how Oikawa had felt when he saw Hajime earlier that day. Regardless, it didn’t hurt to try meeting someone tonight.

Sighing, Tooru looked around again to see if he could spot Kuroo and the others but came up empty. It shouldn’t have been hard either, considering they were all tall but he figured they must be outside somewhere. From his position in the living room he could see into the open concept kitchen as well as the backyard where a good amount of people were standing around.

Pulling out his phone, he checked his messages but Kuroo hadn’t responded yet. He’d just have to wait until Kitamoto came back before they searched for Kuroo and the others. Nonetheless, he quickly sent a message to Akaashi asking him where they were.

“Hey, you’re Oikawa-san right?” He heard from behind him and the brown-haired setter turned his head to look over his shoulder. Upon seeing who it was Tooru smiled a little in surprise as he recognized his neighbour looking back at him.

“Nakamura-san?” He asked, utterly taken back at the coincidence.

“Yeah, it’s me. I thought you looked familiar.” He laughed as Oikawa turned his body to talk properly. “I didn’t know you knew Takashi.”

Pausing Tooru gave him a confused look and Nakamura quickly clarified. “He’s the one that threw this party.”

Feeling slightly embarrassed, Oikawa explained himself. “A friend of mine invited me last minute actually, he’s the one that knows him.”

Nodding in understanding Nakamura shifted the conversation elsewhere and they soon fell into a comfortable discussion. They talked about school and what classes the other was taking, quickly figuring out they went to the same university, before they brought up what they liked to do in their free time.

“Well I don’t usually have much spare time, between work, school and being in a relationship.” The brunette sighed before adding, “but my boyfriend’s pretty understanding. What about you?”

Slightly surprised Oikawa almost wished he had the energy to juggle being in a relationship with everything else in his life, but he knew he couldn’t. “I usually just waste my time watching TV in my free time, but honestly school and volleyball is stressing me out right now. Midterms are coming up too fast.”

“Volleyball? Do you play for Tokyo University’s team?” The brunette asked in curiosity.

“Yeah, I’ve been playing since first year.” Oikawa nodded.

“Ohh, my boyfriend loves volleyball, he always watches the games when he has the chance, but I don’t really have the time to keep up with it.” Nakamura said with a smile, happy to hear Oikawa was a player.

“He’s a fan?” Tooru inquired.

“Completely, I think he said he knows a few members on your team actually, although I don’t know which ones.”

“He sounds like a good guy.” Oikawa said.

“Yeah, I’m actually waiting for him to come back with some drinks for us.” He said, looking around to see if he could spot the man in question. At that moment, Oikawa also wondered where Kitamoto had disappeared to just as he heard a familiar voice coming up behind him.

“Hey sorry it took so long.” Tooru heard before completely freezing for the second time that day.

He paused for a moment as he watched Nakamura smile at the person that had spoken, before turning his head to glance over his shoulder. Clenching his fists and calming his face Oikawa caught the gaze of the man that had broken his heart less than a year ago.

“Oikawa-san, this is my boyfriend Iwaizumi Hajime.”


	4. Chapter 4

As much as Oikawa was used to plastering on a fake smile and pretending everything was alright, the moment he saw Iwaizumi he froze, feeling a fury of emotions welling up as they made eye contact. Nonetheless, he composed himself enough to form a small smile in greeting as he addressed the spiky haired raven. His hair was shorter now, shorter than it had been when they were together, but it still looked good.

“Iwaizumi-san.” Oikawa said politely as he finally forced himself to form a proper smile. “Long time no see.”

As he spoke he watched Iwaizumi’s expression carefully, trying his best to see if the other was just as shocked as he was. Unfortunately, all he saw was the slight frown that formed as Oikawa greeted him.

“You two know each other?” The pretty brunette beside Hajime asked and Oikawa finally turned his attention away from his ex.

“Yeah.” Iwaizumi said. “We used to go to school together.” He explained, handing one of the beers in his hand to Nakamura.

“Thanks, babe.” Misaki responded as he leaned forward and gave the other a small kiss, before pulling away with a smile.

Oikawa slightly clenched his fist as he watched the exchange, knowing that it bothered him more than it should have.

“How long have you guys known each other?” Nakamura asked Oikawa as he drank his beer. “Hajime never talks about when he was younger.”

Hesitating a bit, the setter glanced at the raven for a brief second before he spoke. “Ahh, since we were kids, it wasn’t a very big neighbourhood.”

Raising his eyebrows in surprise, the brunette frowned a little as he turned to his boyfriend. “Why am I hearing about this now? You never mentioned you had a childhood friend going to the same university as us, much less on the volleyball team?”

“Yes, I did, I said my high school captain was on the team.” Iwaizumi explained to the now pouting man.

“Oh, you were the captain?! You must be amazing then, no wondering you’re on the team.” Nakamura praised as he nodded in understanding.

“No, I’m sure there were a lot of people just as capable to be captain, but thank you.” Oikawa responded politely. The whole situation was becoming more awkward as the seconds passed by and the brunette franticly tried to find a way out.

“So, when’s the last time you’ve guys seen one another?” Misaki asked suddenly and the Oikawa hesitated for a moment before he heard the raven across from him speak up.

“It’s been awhile. You know how busy I’ve been. Plus, I’m sure Oikawa-kun has been too.” Iwaizumi said casually.

Oikawa-kun. The name was so sickeningly unfamiliar to him that Tooru wondered if Iwaizumi remembered the last time he called him that. When they were in school it had always been some nickname that was more than an insult than a nickname. Once they had gotten together Iwaizumi kept the nicknames but settled for calling him Oikawa in public and Tooru in private. But now, hearing _Oikawa-kun_ roll of the others tongue so effortlessly made him realize the past was the past, they were complete strangers now.   

“Well, why don’t you two catch up?” Nakamura suggested. “Besides I’ve seen a few people here I haven’t talked to in awhile so I wanted to catch up as well.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, I think Nanami is supposed to arrive any minute now.” The brunette said as he looked around the room to see if he could spot the girl. “It was nice meeting you Oikawa, I’m sure we’ll see each other around.”

Nodding in response, the setter bid Nakamura a farewell. “You too.”

The two silently watched as Misaki walked away, disappearing somewhere around the corner before they were left in silence. Tooru stood there for a few seconds puzzled as to why Iwaizumi hadn’t protested when his boyfriend had suggested they _catch up_. What could they possibly catch up on? If it had been Oikawa he would have done everything in his power to avoid being left alone with Iwaizumi.

“How’ve you been?” Tooru finally asked, too unsettled by the silence.

“Are you really doing this Oikawa?” It caught the setter off guard.

“Doing what?”

“This.” Iwaizumi gestured between the two of them. “Why are you acting like we are friends?”

“Aren’t we?”

“When’s the last time we talked?”

Oikawa frowned as he felt the reality of the question dawn on him. They hadn’t spoken in months.

“It’s not like I wasn’t busy. With school and practice, you shouldn’t expect me to have much free time.” Oikawa defended himself, but knew he had angered the other when Iwaizumi gave him a pointed look.

“Don’t blame this on me. Don’t pretend that we’re not talking because it’s my fault.”

Oikawa paused as he heard the words, trying his best reel in his own anger. Of course, he blamed Hajime. Their breakup had torn Tooru’s heart to pieces because out of everyone in his life, he had never entertained the idea of Hajime leaving his side. They were supposed to spend the rest of their lives together, so why hadn’t Hajime tried to work things out?

Why did he suddenly pull away?

Oikawa had his theories, some more believable than others, but one thing was for certain, they hadn’t broken up _just_ because they had grown apart. He hardly believed after nearly two decades together they could ever grow apart.

Looking back, he realized he was probably too scared to hear the truth. Had Hajime found someone better? Someone he loved more than Tooru at the time? Or had he simply fallen out of love?

 “There’s no point in bringing it up anyway. We can’t change the past.” Oikawa finally said as he dismissed the topic.

“Plus, it looks like you’ve been busy this past year.” He said as he looked over to the pretty brunette, who was now across the room. The man was happily talking to one of his friends and the setter supressed the urge to frown at the cheerfulness in the others attitude. He wasn’t jealous.

With narrowed eyes the raven ignored the comment. “Please Tooru, I doubt you haven’t been with anyone since we ended things.”

The accusation caught the brunette off guard.

As much as he liked to throw the comment back into the others face and tell him he’d been with plenty of guys better than Hajime, he knew he would be lying. It was probably hard to believe, but Oikawa didn’t bother to attempt another relationship after they broke up. And one night stands never interested him. There had been a few times where he was close to throwing himself into a stranger’s arms and attempt to forget about Iwaizumi for the night, but in the end, he hadn’t been able to do it.

“Hmph, you know I’ve always been popular.” He answered, neither confirming or denying anything. He expected there to be a snarky comment or sarcastic remark in response, but that wasn’t what happened.

Instead, there was a long pause before Iwaizumi spoke again. “So, you’re dating?”

“No. Although I don’t see how that’s any of your business.” He replied honestly, knowing there was no point in lying about his love life. It was clear Iwaizumi had easily moved on with his life, there was no point in making up a fake boyfriend to get Hajime’s attention.

“I guess it isn’t anymore.” Iwaizumi agreed as he drank his beer. “Just tell me one thing…”

“What?”

“When did you lose interest?”

* * *

 

It was back in middle school when Oikawa noticed the growing attention Iwaizumi was getting. At the time, the raven hair boy he grew up with was finally growing into a handsome young man and the people around them were certainly beginning to notice.

“Iwa-chan, what is that?” Oikawa asked as they changed their shoes. The taller body leaning over his best friend’s shoulders to see a pretty pink envelope in his small locker. “Did someone accidently mix up the lockers?”

“Shut up, shittykawa.” Iwaizumi snapped as he pulled the note out, reading the name that had been written nicely on the front. _Iwaizumi-san._

Oikawa tried his best to see if there was any indication of who it was from, but before he knew it the spikey haired boy had pushed it into his school bag, zipping it up and slinging it over his shoulder.

“You’re not going to open it?” Tooru said, feeling a bit of displeasure at Iwaizumi’s actions.

“None of your business.” Was all Oikawa got in response before the boy headed for the exit. “Now let’s get home before your mom gets mad. She knows I’m having dinner at your house.”

“Hmph, fine don’t tell me.” The brunette said as he quickly ran to catch up. He knew eventually the boy would cave and tell him. Besides, it wouldn’t be that important if Iwaizumi hid it so fast. Maybe he wasn’t interested? He’d find out his answer eventually.

It wasn’t until a week later after practice did Oikawa finally find out about what had happened with the note.

“Iwaizumi-san, you were great today.” A pretty brunette said as she waited by the gym doors, smiling as she saw the boy in question.

“Thanks, I just need to get changed and then we can leave.” He said with a small smile before making his way towards the changing rooms with Tooru following silently behind.

“Iwa-chan, who was that?” The setter spoke up as they entered the locker room.

 “She was the one that gave me the note last week.” Iwaizumi started, as he slipped out of his uniform jersey. “After texting and talking for a bit we decided to hangout over the weekend. Her name’s Yoshikawa Minami, she’s in class C.”

Oikawa paused with buttoning his uniform shirt and immediately looked up with a shocked expression. “You mean you dating her?”

“We’ve just been hanging out so far. I want to get to know her before I ask her out.” Iwaizumi explained, ignoring his best friend’s reaction to the news. Obviously, Oikawa was overreacting.

“Ask her out?” The brunette echoed, raising an eyebrow as he took a few steps forward. “Is Iwa-chan finally getting himself a girlfriend?” He teased.

“Shut up, idiot.” Iwaizumi snapped as he finished changing, before he slammed the locker shut and walked towards the door. “I’m leaving first, don’t wait up.”

“Don’t forget to smile Iwa-chan.” Oikawa called out, “You don’t want to scare her away.”

When he heard the door shut in response the setter finally let out a sigh, slumping slightly as he quietly finished changing. Once he was done, he said his farewells to the remaining members in the locker room before heading home, all the while ignoring the bitter emotions he was feeling.

* * *

 

“Lose interest?” Oikawa asked, frowning at the cold look he was getting from the man. What was Iwaizumi getting at?

“You know what I mean.” Iwaizumi continued, taking a small step forward to whisper his next few words. “When did you decide you were bored of everything?”

“Bored of everything?” Oikawa echoed again, this time catching onto what the man was asking. Was Iwaizumi serious? “You’re asking me this after everything that happened? Was _I_ the one that got bored?”

“Oh, come on. I’ve known you long enough to know you shift your attention to the next pretty thing that catches your eye.” Iwaizumi accused with such a cold voice that Oikawa had to stop himself from flinching. “Or is your memory that selective that you forgot?”

The question confused the brunette, but Oikawa didn’t have the chance to say anything at first as he noticed his classmate walking out of the kitchen with a few beers in his hand. Besides, if he started arguing with Hajime now, it would only bring up unwanted feeling he had tried his best to bury. Instead, he let a sly smile grace his face as he glared at the other man.

“My memories are decent enough to remember how good at lying you were. So, tell me…” Oikawa paused before asking something that had been on his mind the moment Nakamura had left them alone. “Why’d you lie to Nakamura? Did you not want him to know about us?”

“Us?” Iwaizumi said simply. “Why would I tell him about something that ended a long time ago.”

“Hmm, that’s a good idea.” The setter agreed. “You wouldn’t want him to worry about where his boyfriend is when he says he’s busy, right? All you need to do is keep him satisfied enough to make him believe you’re into him.” Oikawa said, knowing he hit a nerve when the man glared at him.

“Oh, don’t worry he’s plenty satisfied.” Iwaizumi said, leaning down to whisper his last few words. “You of all people should know that.”

Oikawa stiffened as he felt the others breath on his ear as he heard the sinfully sexy voice. He didn’t bother to say anything else as he watched his classmate approach them and before he knew Iwaizumi had pushed past him and headed in the direction of the pretty brunette from earlier.

“Sorry it took so long.” Kitamoto said as he handed Oikawa the beer.

“Thank you.” The volleyball player said with a forced smile before taking a long drink from the bottle.

“Woah, slow down there.” A voice suddenly said from behind him and Tooru wasn’t sure if he should feel relieved or annoyed that the owner of it finally decided to show his face. Turning his body, Oikawa took in the sight of a familiar cat like grin and glared at the man.

“Kuroo, where were you?”

“Nowhere.” He said, walking forward to sling an arm around Oikawa’s shoulders before whispering his next few words. “You’re not the only one that was hoping to get lucky tonight.” He said, motioning subtly towards his classmate.

“It’s not like that.” The setter hissed through gritted teeth as he pushed the other off of him. A moment later he took a few steps forward, back in ear shot of his classmate, before he smiled. “Kitamato-san, let me introduce you. This is Kuroo, he plays on the same team as me.”

“Nice to meet you.” The brunette said with a small smile.

“Same here. I’m glad Tooru’s finally making some friends.” The raven said with a sly smirk, before he placed a hand on the setter’s waist and pulled him closer. “I get worried sometimes.”

Oikawa supressed the urge to punch Kuroo in the face when he heard the words. He was about to tell the other to shut up but stopped when he heard Kitamoto speak.

“Are you guys…” The brunette asked, shifting his gaze between the two. “Together?”

A few seconds later Kuroo let out a chuckle as he let go of his friend’s waist. “Oh, he wishes.”

“Hmph, I’d never become that desperate.” Oikawa retorted as he took another drink. “I have standards.”

“Yeah, yeah.” The man said, rolling his eyes at the comment. “Anyway, did you see anyone else tonight? I left the others for a bit, but I didn’t realize there would be so many people, now I can’t find them.”

“No. I didn’t see anyone.” Oikawa lied. “Maybe we should look around? If that’s alright with you?” He asked, feeling a bit bad about dragging his classmate around. He didn’t want the man to follow his all evening if he didn’t want to.

“I’m fine with it.” Kitamoto nodded, “Besides, I think a few of my friends are here as well. We can look for them too.”

“Alright, let’s get out of here.” Kuroo agreed before they exited the room to look for everyone.

* * *

 

It wasn’t until an hour and few beers later did Oikawa start to feel a little better. They had managed to meet up with Akaashi and Bokuto as well as Kitamoto’s friends after a little while of looking. Unfortunately, it didn’t take long before Kitamoto was pulled away by one of his friends and Bokuto had wondered off somewhere with Akaashi, leaving behind Oikawa to handle Kuroo.

“Why am I stuck with you?” The setter asked, scowling as he watched his friend open another beer. They were back in the living room, leaning against a wall as they watched the groups of people around the room laugh and talk with one another.

“I’m not happy about it either. I was hoping to get laid tonight.” The raven said, with a sly smile. “Although watching you sulk all night almost makes up for it.”

“Fuck off.” Oikawa snapped, not in the mood for Kuroo’s tasteless taunts. He was about to tell the other to leave him alone when out of the corner of his eye he noticed something. Shifting his gaze, he watched as the brunette pulled the raven to the corner of the room, laughing slightly as he let his hands run through the short hair.

"You okay with that?" He heard Kuroo ask from beside him, handing him a beer. Oikawa rolled his eyes and took another look at the couple who were locked in kiss.

"It's not like they're serious." He said as he lifted the drink to his lips. "They're just fucking."


	5. Chapter 5

In the beginning of his relationship with Misaki, Iwaizumi had to admit some mornings when he woke up and saw the mop of brown hair sticking out from under the sheets he thought, just for a moment, it was someone else. At first, he had been mad at himself, that he couldn’t get over Tooru as easily as the brunette had gotten over him. But now, as he opened his eyes and noticed the brunette resting his head on the pillow next to him, he realized he felt resentment. Resentment that he wasted so much time on someone that didn’t love him.

He hadn’t expected to see the setter at the party last night, but he figured Tooru had always liked going out and having a good time. Even if it wasn’t with Iwaizumi. Now almost a year later, it didn’t bother the raven, but back then, when they were together, that had been different. He had never been possessive or demanding when it came to what Oikawa did or where he went, back then he had trusted the man wholeheartedly.

It wasn’t until after everything had ended did Hajime wonder if Oikawa had been laughing at how naïve he had been.

Stretching and getting up from the large bed, Iwaizumi made his way into the small bathroom of Misaki’s apartment and quickly stepped into the shower. He didn’t bother to wake the brunette up, knowing his boyfriend liked to sleep in as much as he liked morning sex. But he decided after how much they had done it the previous night, he would let Misaki get some rest. Besides he always liked heading to the gym early on Sunday mornings.

After the shower he wrapped a towel around his waist and re-entered the bedroom quietly, grabbing the extra pair of clothes he usually kept in the dresser, he quickly changed. After several months of dating he had surprisingly become comfortable enough to spend a few days at a time at Misaki’s apartment and although the place was further away from the university, it had a nice view of Tokyo from the balcony and was closer to the shopping district.

Once he had finished dressing, he strolled into the kitchen and turned on the coffee machine before pulling out his phone to check his messages.

**[Makki: Hey, are you free in a couple of weeks?]**

He raised an eyebrow at the message, mentally checking if he had forgotten anyone’s upcoming birthday, but thankfully came up empty.

**[Iwaizumi: What day? I’ll be done midterms by then, so I should be fine. What’s up?]**

Shoving the phone back into his pocket the raven walked over to the kitchen table and picked up his gym bag. He felt the phone buzz a few seconds later and checked the message.

**[Makki: It’s a Friday. It’s the same week the offers for the national volleyball team come out.]**

**[Makki: A few of the boys wanna throw a party for the people that make it. Although we don’t know if anyone’s going to get an offer.]**

Iwaizumi re-read the message once. Of course, he knew most of the players were getting ready to impress the national team scouts in the upcoming weeks.

**[Iwaizumi: Yeah, I’m up for it, text me the details.]**

Pressing the button on the coffee machine the raven waited as the steaming hot coffee fell into the cup, filling the air with the strong, bitter scent. He took the time to send a message to his parents, updating them on his plans for the day and how exams were going before he grabbed the creamer from the fridge and sweetened his coffee. He never liked sweet things in general, but Iwaizumi still had enough of a soul to not drink his coffee straight. People like that must already be dead inside.

Sipping on his coffee slowly, the raven decided to walk towards the balcony and slide the door open to step out into the warm morning air. It was already warm enough in Tokyo that he didn’t need to wear a jacket on the sunnier days and this was one of the things preferred about the city. He stepped forward to lean on the railing of the balcony, overlooking the busy streets below.

It was peaceful. Or at least it was until he heard a soft gasp.

Turning his head to the source of the sound, Iwaizumi almost dropped the cup in his hand. He expected chance meetings, they went to the same university after all, but after months of no unexpected encounters he had begun to believe he would get used to not seeing Tooru all the time. He was wrong.

Standing a few feet away, on the balcony next to him, stood Oikawa with a tell tale shocked expression gracing his pretty face. Iwaizumi froze, taking in the appearance of the other. Oikawa looked like had just crawled out of bed with his hair un-styled and sticking up in every direction, his cheeks slightly puffy from sleeping and his oversized shirt that fell to his thighs.

He wasn’t wearing anything else from what Iwaizumi could see. Hajime frowned.

“Ah, I’ll leave.” Oikawa said, obviously flustered by the sudden encounter.

“It’s fine.” Iwaizumi forced out, knowing that although their meeting last night had ended horribly he wouldn’t force the other to avoid him. He could be civil. “It’s not like you can’t be out here.”

The brunette paused for a moment and nodded in understanding as he silently braced his back against the railing. They stayed silent for a few minutes, Iwaizumi taking in the scenery of Sunday morning Tokyo before he stole a glance at the setter. From the position Oikawa was standing Iwaizumi could see the way the piece of cloth hugged Tooru’s body. If he was being honest he would say it was sexy, in a way only Tooru could be. Alluring yet modest, pretty yet innocent. Maybe it was because Oikawa didn’t know he was sexy when he looked like this, even if his hair was a mess and his eyes were still red from just waking up, he looked unbelievably good.

It annoyed Iwaizumi.           

“So, what are you doing up so early?” Oikawa asked suddenly, and the question caught him off guard. He wanted to ask the man why he even cared, but it was too early to get riled up.

“I was planning on working out.” Iwaizumi explained, watching the others expression waver a bit, as if he wanted to say something but opted not to. “You?”

“Huh?”

“What about you?” The raven asked. His voice sounded raspy from all the alcohol he drank last night, and he took a sip of the warn coffee to quench his thirst.

“I couldn’t sleep.” Oikawa admitted. “Bad dream.”

Iwaizumi nodded as he recalled the times Oikawa would get nightmares. When they were kids, the boy would roll around until someone shook him awake and reassured him he was alright. Eventually he grew out of them, but when they first moved to Tokyo every so often, when the brunette was worried about something, he would get them. And Iwaizumi would be there to pull Tooru close and whisper words of comfort.

“Worried about something?” He asked, trying his best not show the sliver of concern he was feeling.

“Is it that obvious?” Oikawa asked sighing as he turned his body to look at the cars below. The shirt rode up a little as he braced his elbows on the edge, letting his head rest on his hands. Iwaizumi could see he was wearing a pair of boxers underneath the shirt and almost let out a sigh of relief at knowing Oikawa wasn’t completely naked. Although, it didn’t help that he could see the brunette’s smooth thighs and firm ass that hugged his underwear when he bent forward.

“But I think I have it under control.” The setter mumbled more to himself than anything, but Iwaizumi still heard the words. They stayed silent for a few moments after that, the raven slowly sipping on his hot coffee until Oikawa spoke up again.

“Iwaizumi…” The man began, “Can I ask you something?”

Iwaizumi. The raven almost scoffed at how formal it was.

“What is it?”

“Do you hate me?” Oikawa asked, as he turned his head away from Iwaizumi line of sight to prevent the raven from seeing his expression.

Hate. Hajime racked his head to think of whether he had ever felt that way about Tooru, about anyone for that matter. He didn’t think so.

“No, I don’t hate you.” He answered honestly. “Just because we broke up doesn’t mean I hate you. I just don’t want you in my life anymore.”

The words came out harsher than he intended but there was no point in lying to the brunette. Although, he wasn’t sure what Oikawa was getting at from asking a question like that.

“Is it because you moved on? Because you don’t want to think about me anymore?” Tooru asked. “I’m glad you’re happy.”

Happy for him. Iwaizumi wondered if the man was telling him that because he was relieved Hajime was still able to find someone after everything that had happened, or if the words were genuine. He figured it was the former. Because who wouldn’t want to be forgiven by the people they screwed over in the past.

“Is that what it is?” He spoke up. “You think I didn’t talk to you after we broke up because I hadn’t moved on yet?”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Or did you think I couldn’t live my life without you?” Iwaizumi questioned.

“No.”

“Then what is it Oikawa?” He asked. “You obviously had a lot more to say last night. Are you trying to play nice because you know I’m better off now? Because I’m with someone I love?”

Iwaizumi didn’t realize what he had just said until he saw Oikawa’s shocked gaze. The hurt expression caught the raven of guard, mostly because he didn’t think Tooru cared enough to show any emotion towards him anymore. But nonetheless he paused for a moment to take in his words.

Was he in love with Misaki?

The first time he had said the words to the other man was almost six months into their relationship and even then, it wasn’t the same when he had told Tooru.

He loved Misaki because of the things he knew about the man, but he certainly didn’t know everything. He didn’t know much about his family or the friends he grew up with, he didn’t even know what Misaki planned for his future but at the time he felt it was right to say the words.

“Is it so hard to think I’m wishing you the best? That I want to be friends?” Oikawa answered, a hint of anger in his voice.

“Friends?” Iwaizumi echoed. “You think we can be friends?”

For Hajime, he already knew the answer. No. Because as much as it would be nice to go back to the days of hanging out and laughing together, they couldn’t.

“We could try.”

* * *

 The day Oikawa found out Iwaizumi was interested in guys was when they were back in high school. It was in their second year, right after Oikawa had been dumped by his current girlfriend.

“It’s not my fault she couldn’t see volleyball comes before anything else in my life.” He defended himself as they sat in Iwaizumi’s room.

“I think she expected you to at least take her out on a date or something.” Iwaizumi said for his desk as he worked on his homework. Oikawa let out a sigh from where he was lying down on Iwaizumi’s bed.

“I guess if I can’t find someone that loves volleyball as much as me I won’t be happy.” Tooru admitted, ignoring Iwaizumi’s words. “Maybe I should just marry Iwa-chan.”

Hajime stopped writing as he heard the comment, scowling before he turned towards the teen on his bed. “Like that would ever happen.”

“What does that mean?” Oikawa asked as he sat up. “Am I not your type?”

“Self-centered and annoying, no you’re not.” The raven replied, turning back to his homework.

“Then who is your type? Matssun? Makki?” The setter questioned. “Are you even interested in guys?”

“Yes, I am.” He replied, honestly. “Is there a problem with that.”

It felt like a slap in the face when Tooru heard the comment. He paused as he tried to compose himself. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier?”

“I didn’t see the point.” The raven answered, looking up from his paper and noticing the sad look he was getting from his best friend. “It’s not like I’ve been with a guy before, I just find them as attractive as girls.”

“Have you ever liked anyone on the team?” The setter asked suddenly before he could stop himself.

“No.”

“How about anyone in our class?”

“No. And even if I did I wouldn’t tell you.” The raven said simply.

“Oh, come on Iwa-chan. There must be someone. “Oikawa prodded and this time the raven stayed silent, focusing on his homework rather than his friends question.

“So, there is someone. Do I know him?” The brunette asked, feeling a familiar sense of dread wash over him. A sensation he hadn’t felt since middle school when Iwaizumi had gotten his first girlfriend. Back then Iwaizumi had always been by his side up until that point and when he suddenly wasn’t, it bothered him. At first, he tried to tell himself it was because Iwaizumi never had time for him anymore but when he stumbled upon his best friend kissing his girlfriend behind the gym he knew he had been kidding himself.

He was jealous. Jealous of the girl that was wrapped in his best friend’s arms. Jealous that he hadn’t been the one to kiss Iwaizumi first.  

“I’m not interested in anyone right now.” Iwaizumi responded. “And before you worry about me you should worry about your own love life. Didn’t you just get dumped?”

“She just didn’t understand my love for volleyball. But there’s one more thing…” He began before trailing off.

“What?”

“Have you ever thought about me?” Oikawa asked, finding his heart beginning to race as he said the words. There was a pause before-

“No, why would I think about your ugly face.”

“Hmph, you’re loss. You’d be lucky to be with someone as pretty as me.” Oikawa said as he fell back onto the bed, ending the conversation. Although, Iwaizumi missed the way Tooru scowled as he grabbed the covers and pulled them over his head.

* * *

 “I don’t expect us to go back to the way we used to be. But when we hangout with everyone, small talk wouldn’t hurt?” Oikawa suggested, meeting Iwaizumi’s gaze for the first time. 

The raven paused for a moment, finding it hard to look at Tooru when his eyes looked like they were pleading. Like Hajime was the one that kept them apart. However, despite himself, he spoke up.

“I’m fine with that.” Iwaizumi agreed, seeing Oikawa smile a little as his eye lit up. “There’s no point in avoiding one another anyway. Plus, I haven’t seen the others in awhile.”

“Me neither, I hope Makki and Matssun are doing well.” The brunette nodded, and Iwaizumi was about to speak up, to tell him about how their friends were doing, until he saw the door to Oikawa’s balcony slide open and someone step out.

“Hey, you were out here.” The tall man said, and Iwaizumi vaguely remembered it was the guy Oikawa had been with in the library. He watched as he ex-boyfriend straightened up and turned to face the man, obviously shocked at the mans sudden appearance.

“Kitamoto-san, good morning.” Oikawa greeted with a fake smile Iwaizumi had seen too many times to ever think it was natural. “Are you leaving?”

“Yeah, my friend’s waiting downstairs.” The man said with smile. “Just wanted to thank you for last night.”

“Anytime.” Oikawa nodded, as he stepped inside momentarily, to show the man out. Iwaizumi stood there for a few moments, wondering if he should even wait for the setter to come back, but before he knew it Tooru was stepping back outside with a small smile on his face.

“Did you send your boyfriend off?” Iwaizumi asked, his expression indifferent as he looked at Oikawa.

“It wasn’t like that.” Oikawa began. “He just slept over because he was too drunk.”

“You don’t have to lie, you can fuck who ever you want.” Iwaizumi said as he finished up his coffee before internally adding, _it never stopped you before._  He didn’t need anymore excuses from the brunette.

“Anyway, the guys wanted to hangout next weekend, if you haven’t seen them in awhile you can come over. Just text Hanamaki.” Iwaizumi explained before he turned to re-enter the apartment. “See you around.”

* * *

 Oikawa yawned as he walked out of his last lecture, happy the long week of midterms were finally coming to a close. They had more or less gone alright, although he was glad they were over. He needed to focus on volleyball now and the upcoming tournament that would mostly likely make or break his hopes of making it to the national team.

He needed to impress the scouts. He just wasn’t sure he could do it.

Maybe that was why he decided to text Makki not long after Iwaizumi had left him on the balcony. Up until they had broken up, Iwaizumi had been there for Tooru to vent all his problems to; to tell him about all his insecurities and fears of not being good enough. But in this past year Oikawa had learned to keep everything to himself, in hopes he would be able to work through those problems on his own.

It didn’t work. The more he bottled up his fears, the more he worried he wouldn’t make it to the national team. That he would watch Ushijima always be one step ahead of him.

That was why he decided to meet up with his old teammates, so he could at least seek some comfort in listening to what they had to tell him. Despite Hanamaki and Matsukawa always teasing him, they had his back, and Oikawa figured it wouldn’t hurt to keep them close. Even if Iwaizumi wasn’t with him anymore, he hoped his other friendships would still be strong.

He needed them to be.

Pulling out his phone, Oikawa checked his missed messages and noticed Makki had texted him about what their plans were for the weekend.

**[Makki: Hey, you’re still coming tomorrow right? We’re just gonna be hanging out at Iwaizumi’s place, probably order some food and watch a movie or something.]**

Oikawa frowned a little as he read the message. He had prepared himself to see Hajime again, but going over to his place was a bigger step than he expected to take. His suggestion a week ago had been on a whim, but nonetheless he was happy that Iwaizumi had agreed to taking the first steps of mending their broken relationship.

Even it was just as friends.

**[Oikawa: Alright]**

**[Oikawa: I’ll head over after practice tomorrow. Just text me the address.]**

Sighing as he sent the message, the setter headed to the gym, feeling oddly nervous about the meeting, but pushing the thoughts aside knowing he needed to give it his all when it came to volleyball.

He would worry about his ex-boyfriend later.

* * *

 “So, you’re telling me you live next to Iwaizumi’s current boyfriend?” The light gray haired man said as the pair settled down at a table in the small café after Oikawa’s practice.

“It was a complete coincidence. I met him a few hours before finding out he was Iwaizumi’s boyfriend.” Oikawa said with a sigh, letting his head fall into his arms on the table. “Apparently they’ve been dating for awhile too.”

“Well, you knew he was dating.” Sugawara said as he shuffled through the menu.

“I didn’t expect them to be so close.” The brunette defended, scowling as he recalled the encounter he had the morning after the party. He had barely gotten any sleep that night, considering his classmate had gotten too drunk to get himself home safely and Oikawa had taken pity on the man and let him sleep on the couch. The next morning, he had unfortunately woken up from a bad dream and decided to drag himself out of bed to relax on the balcony. It was good place to sort out his thoughts when his life seemed to be in chaos.

Unfortunately, he hadn’t expected to see Iwaizumi looking as handsome as ever as he stepped out onto the adjacent balcony.

“He’s completely moved on, I’m just an afterthought now.” Oikawa said as he remembered the awkward conversation he had that morning.

“Oikawa, it’s Iwaizumi.” Suga said as he put down the menu to look at his friend. He was one of the only people that Oikawa trusted to speak openly with about his love life. “There’s no way he would ever forget about you. Regardless of what happened, he was in love with you, right?”

“Was.” Oikawa repeated, emphasising the meaning. “But I obviously wasn’t good enough to make him stay.”

“It’s natural for two people to grow apart.” The former setter reassured him, but Oikawa sighed as he thought about the weeks leading up to their break up.

“I doubt growing apart was the only thing that broke us up.” The brunette said.

“What do you mean?”

Tooru paused as he lifted his head from the table, looking his friend in the eyes as he admitted something he had been thinking for a long time, something he hadn’t told anyone because if he didn’t say it out loud then maybe it wouldn't be true.

“I think he moved on to someone else before we broke up.”

“What?”

“I’m saying I think he cheated on me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys liked it!


	6. Chapter 6

“He what? Why am I only hearing about this now?!” The silver haired man asked, obviously shocked at the sudden confession.

“Because I’m saying I don’t know for sure.” Oikawa admitted, frowning as he felt the old wounds open up again.

“What happened?”

“Well…”

* * *

The day Oikawa met Iwaizumi’s lab partner was when he came home from practice early and was greeted with a pretty raven-haired girl currently cooking in their kitchen.

“And you just need to watch the vegetables to make sure they don’t burn.” The girl explained as she dumped the chopped vegetables into the frying pan.

“Like this?” Iwaizumi asked as he tried to keep everything evenly spaced out, so nothing was burning.

“Yes.” She nodded, laughing a bit before adding, “You’re a fast learner Iwaizumi-san.”

Oikawa frowned as he watched the scene, annoyed that the couple hadn’t noticed his entrance yet, but nonetheless he dropped his bags and spoke up for the first time since entering his apartment.

“I’m home.” He said with a fake smile and the pair looked up from cooking.

“Oh, you’re early.” Iwaizumi said as put down the knife in his hand.

“Yeah, practice ended early today.” The brunette said as he walked into the kitchen, looking over Iwaizumi’s shoulder to see what they were cooking.

“You must be Iwaizumi-san’s roommate, nice to meet you.” The girl spoke up. “I’m  Kurasaki Kaori, we have the same lab together.”

“Nice to meet you.” He said, smiling kindly at the raven, however the smile didn’t reach his eyes. He didn’t like this girl. “Are you guys making dinner?”

“Yes. We met up after class trying to finish our lab reports and we lost track of time. Iwaizumi-san was nice enough to offer to make dinner, but I told him I could help if he had the right ingredients.”

“Well it smells delicious, I can’t wait to try some.” Oikawa complemented.

“I thought you were going to go out with the guys after practice, so I didn’t make any for you.”

“Mean, Iwa-chan!” He responded with a pout before adding, “There’s enough for all three of us, right Kurosaki-chan?”

He leaned forward just enough for the girl to blush a little at the sudden evasion of space.

“O-Of course.” She managed to say before turning back to the pan on the stove, focusing on the stir fry rather than the handsome setter. Oikawa missed the small scowl Iwaizumi shot him.

“Anything I can help with?” He asked, this time peering over Kaori’s shoulders to see what she was doing. She was almost half a foot shorter than him and the position allowed Tooru to easily tower over the small girl.

“No, just go watch TV or something.” Iwaizumi answered, his voice sounding oddly cold and Oikawa turned to catch the pointed look he was getting.

“Hmph, fine.” The volleyball player said before stalking over to the couch and settling himself down, turning on the television as he did so.

The rest of the evening went well, until Kaori finally left, and Iwaizumi voiced something he had been holding in all night.

“What was that?”

“What was what?” Oikawa asked as he finished washing the dishes and wiped his hands.  

“ _Kaori-chan?_ I shouldn’t have to say this but don’t flirt with my lab partner of all people.” Iwaizumi said with a frown.

“I wasn’t flirting.” Tooru defended, but he knew he was lying. He was being petty.

“That’s bullshit. The whole night you were being overly friendly with her.” The raven said as he walked closer to where his boyfriend was standing. “Were you trying to make me jealous or something?”

“Were you?”

“Geez, Oikawa you’re my boyfriend. Of course, I’m going to be mad if I see you openly hit on someone in front of me.” Iwaizumi said, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

“Then maybe you shouldn’t bring a girl that you just met to our apartment.” Oikawa defended, revealing what had been on his mind the whole night.

“Are you serious?” Iwaizumi asked, almost dumfounded at the confession. Oikawa was jealous. “You’re jealous that we were alone?”

“I wasn’t jealous.” The setter insisted but Iwaizumi saw through the obvious lie. It was rare for Oikawa to be jealous, especially since it was usually the other way around. Nonetheless he smirked as he hugged the other from behind and whispered into his ear.

“You think I would look at anyone other than you?” He said, his voice low as he bit Tooru’s ear.

“I think she might be interested in you, Iwa-chan.” Oikawa confessed as he turned himself around in the other arms, their face inches apart now. “You don’t know what you do to people, what you do to me.”

“Hmm, and what do I do to you?” Iwaizumi continued, this time letting one of his hands sneak under Tooru’s shirt to trace his fingers along the small of his back.

“This.” Oikawa said as he leaned forward to capture the raven’s lips, moaning as they lost themselves in one another’s presence.

The topic of Iwaizumi’s lap partner didn’t come up again after that.

* * *

“For the rest of the semester she would come over almost once a week for them to finish their lab reports together.” Oikawa explained. “Although I could see she was obviously flirting with Iwa-chan, I didn’t bother to bring it up because I trusted him. Even if she came onto him, I knew he would reject her.”

“So why do you think he cheated?”

“Well, around a month before out break up we began to fight a lot, over the smallest things.” Oikawa said as he ran his fingers through his hair. “I was under a lot of stress from trying to impress the scouts and Iwaizumi was focusing on exams, we both didn’t have time to spend with each other."

"But she still spent a lot of time with him. They would go out after labs and sometimes he would go over to her place to study, but I didn’t bother to bring up how uncomfortable I was because I knew it would just cause more problems.”

“Until the day when the national teams offer came out and I hadn’t received one. Looking back, I knew I hadn’t played my best in the recent tournaments, probably because I was worried about school and how much I was fighting with him, but it still came as a shock.” Tooru admitted.

“He came home late that day.”

* * *

Oikawa dropped his bag as he walked into the empty apartment. It was already past eight and Tooru frowned as he realized Iwaizumi wasn’t home. He hadn’t even received a text message.

“Just what I needed.” Oikawa whispered bitterly as he switched on the lights. He quietly walked into their bedroom and changed into sweats and one of Iwaizumi’s t-shirts before pulling out his phone and ordering a pizza. He wasn’t in the mood to cook, not after the day he had had.

In all honestly, he hadn’t expected to get the offer, but he still felt bitter as he heard that Ushijima had been given one. What was worst was that Ushiwaka didn’t seem surprised about it, like he had expected all along that he would make it to the national team.

Walking over to the fridge, he pulled out a beer and opened it, taking a long drink before he settled himself on the couch and scrolled through Netflix. Not long after the pizza arrived, and Oikawa quickly paid the man. He ate his dinner with a few more beers and by the time the movie he had been watching ended he was full and more than a little drunk.

Sighing, Oikawa checked his phone to see if Iwaizumi had texted him, but unfortunately, he still hadn’t received any messages. It was almost eleven. He contemplated calling the raven, but he wondered if that would just bother the man. However, just as his finger hovered over the call button, he heard the front door open.

“Iwa-chan?” He called out, still feeling slightly dizzy from the beers.

“Oh, you’re still up.” The raven said as he walked into the living room, dropping his backpack near the couch. “I thought you’d be sleeping.”

“Where were you?” Oikawa asked before he could stop himself.

“I went out for dinner after classes.” He said as he noticed the empty beers scattered around the place. “Did you have someone over?”

“No.” The setter responded as he got up from the couch. “Who did you go with?”

“Kurosaki-san.” Iwaizumi replied as he frowned at the way Oikawa’s cheeks had a light tint of red, obviously from drinking too much. “What are you doing drinking by yourself?”

Of course, it was Kurosaki.

“Just Kurosaki-chan?” He questioned, ignoring the concerned look he was getting.

“What does it matter?” The raven asked, “Why are you avoiding my question? Are you drunk?”

“It matters to me.”

“Are you serious? You’re going to make a problem out of me hanging out with one of my friends?”

“You two hardly act as friends. You probably see more of her than you do of me.” Oikawa accused, knowing he wasn’t being fair because they both were busy nowadays.

“Its obvious she flirts with you every time she gets a chance.” Oikawa continued, letting out thoughts he had bottled up until then. “Have you even told her I’m your boyfriend? Or are we still roommates because you don’t want her to stop hitting on you, because you want her to spread her legs for you?”

“Oikawa.” Iwaizumi spoke up, his voice cold and uncaring. “Say another word and you’ll regret it. You can have a problem with me, but don’t bring other people into this. Quit acting like a child.”

“What about you? Aren’t we supposed to be in a relationship? You can’t even send me a text to tell me where you are. Is that so hard?” He asked, feeling his anger fade as sadness washed over him. How did things end up like this?

“I lost track of time.” Iwaizumi defended. “Let’s not get into this now. I have to wake up early tomorrow.” He said as he headed towards the bedroom without another word, leaving Oikawa alone in the living room, trying his best not to cry.  

* * *

“After that, we drifted apart even more. It didn’t help that he continued to spend time with her because they had class together.” Oikawa said as he ate the sandwich he had ordered. “And I couldn’t tell him to stop seeing her, since they were lab partners.”

“It felt like I was the problem and every time he told me he was studying with her it made me think that he was trying to escape to something better. Like he didn’t want to deal with me anymore, so he found someone else.” Tooru explained. “I began to doubt whether our relationship would last, or if Iwa-chan would give up on it.”

He paused as he tried his best to keep his tears from falling, because he knew if he started, he wouldn’t be able to stop. And there was no point in crying over someone that threw him away.

“And as you know we eventually broke up near the end of semester.” He said, remembering the way he had confided in his friend when he and Iwaizumi had split. “But about a week after we ended it, I had come back to the apartment to get a change of clothes before heading back to Makki and Matsun’s place…”

“I ended up walking in to see his lab partner in the kitchen cooking breakfast in one of his shirts.”

Sugawara’s eyes widened at the confession. “You mean he slept with her?”

“From the hickeys on her neck, I’d say yes.” Oikawa confirmed. “She told me he was in the shower and I didn’t bother to stick around long enough to see his face.”

“I’m sorry.” Suga said, lost for words. “Oh, Tooru I’m sorry.”

He couldn’t even imagine having someone he loved doing that to him. Much less someone like Iwaizumi who knew Tooru better than anyone else.

“It’s not your fault. And besides I don’t know if they did anything when we were still together. He had every right to screw around with people afterwards.” Oikawa admitted. “I just didn’t think he would move on so fast.”

“Did you talk to him about it afterwards?” His friend asked and Tooru shook his head. After he realized Iwaizumi had moved on, he decided to keep his distance, knowing there was no point in talking to someone that didn’t want him to stay.

“No.” Oikawa said. “I didn’t see the point.”

“But enough about me.” He dismissed the topic. “Why don’t you cheer me up by telling me how you fell for Dai-chan? I bet it was a true love story.”

“Oh, shut up.” Suga said as he rolled his eyes, although Oikawa laughed at the small blush on his friend’s face.

* * *

The next day, by the time he had arrived at Iwaizumi’s apartment, it was already half past nine and he felt odd as he stepped out of the elevator and made his way to the apartment. Standing outside of the door Oikawa calmed his nerves and gently knocked. A few seconds later the door opened where he was greeted with Iwaizumi dressed in a plain black t-shirt and grey sweats. He looked good.

“Come in, we just ordered pizza.” Iwaizumi said casually, and Oikawa hesitated before stepping into the small apartment. Once inside he took the time to quickly look over the place. There was a small kitchen that connected to the living room and upon walking into the living room he could see a corridor that probably lead to a bedroom and washroom. The place was nice.

“Well, look who decided to show up.” Hanamaki said as he got up from the couch and hugged his friend. Oikawa smiled as he embraced the other, happy that he was seeing his friends after almost a month apart.

“Good to see you, Makki.” He said before stepping back and pulling Matsukawa into a hug. “You too, Matsun.”

The raven-haired man smiled slightly as he ruffled Oikawa’s hair, getting a pout from the volleyball player in response.

“So, what were you guys doing?” He asked as he tried to pat down his hair that was still slightly damp from his shower after practice.

“Just catching up.”

“Is anyone else still coming?”

“Yahaba said he has a midterm on Monday, so he can’t. And Kyotani didn’t bother to respond to my messages.” Hanamaki explained.

“Kindichi said he had something to do with Kunami so they can’t make it.” Iwaizumi said from behind them and Oikawa turned to meet his green eyes. The setter simply nodded in understanding, feeling slightly uncomfortable about how causal the other was being.

“Well, I guess it’s just the four of us.” Matsukawa said as he sat down on the couch again, grabbing the remote and flipping through the channels. “What do you guys wanna watch?”

“Anything’s fine with me. We still need to wait until the pizza gets here.” Iwaizumi said settling down next to the raven, with Hanamaki sitting on Matsukawa’s other side. It took Oikawa few seconds to realize the only remaining spot was the space next to Iwaizumi and he paused, wondering if it he should take the seat. Sighing, he decided there was no point in making a fuss if Hajime was fine with it. So, he settled himself down on the soft couch, making sure to keep a few inches apart from Iwaizumi.

“So, how’s the team Oikawa?” Hanamaki said as he leaned his head forward to look at the brunette.

“Good, we’ve been doing pretty good so far this season. We’re expecting to do well on our upcoming tournament if everything goes well.” He said, smiling as he talked about his team. As much as he was nervous about what was in store for him with the national team, he still enjoyed volleyball, more than he had in a long time. It was what kept him going.

“Aren’t you nervous about the scouts coming?” Matsun asked and Oikawa froze as he felt his fears wash over him again.

“Yeah, I am.” He replied, looking down at his lap. “But it’s something I’ve wanted my whole life. Even if I don’t make it, at least I know I gave it a try.”

“You’ll make it.” He heard and looked up to meet Iwaizumi’s reassuring gaze, feeling himself comforted by how sure the raven sounded.

“I mean you’re one of the best setters in the university scene, why wouldn’t you make it?” He continued as if it was common knowledge. And it was, but Oikawa was taken off guard at the sudden compliment, even if Iwaizumi was simply stating the facts.

“Thank you.” He nodded, suddenly feeling uncomfortable on what to say next but luckily Makki spoke up to save him.

“Yeah, your whole life is volleyball, why wouldn’t you make it?” Makki asked but Oikawa could tell his friend was teasing him. “I mean you’re practically useless in everything else you do.”

“Makki, rude!” He shouted before pouting at the way his friends laughed at him, even Iwaizumi. Although it was more of an amused smile than a laugh. He missed it.

“So, what about your life, Iwaizumi?” Matsukawa asked, “You’re graduating this semester, right?”

“Yeah, I still have a few midterms left, but overall work and school’s been good.” Iwaizumi explained. “I’m getting used to the different rotations and I think I’ll be able to get an internship at a clinic once I graduate.”

“Damn, I don’t know how you do it.” Makki whistled lightly. “But I guess it makes sense, you worked pretty damn hard for it.”

“Thanks.” Iwaizumi nodded before he grabbed the remote and began scrolling through their movie options. “What you guys wanna watch?”

“Anything’s fine with me.” Matsun said as he finished his beer. “Does anyone want one?”

Oikawa hesitated for a few seconds before Makki piped up. “Yeah get me and Oikawa one.”

“No, I’m fine. I’m not in the mood today.” The brunette declined but he could see the knowing look he was getting from Hanamaki and knew his friend wasn’t falling for it. “I mean, I have to drive so I probably shouldn’t.”

“I’ll drive you home if anything happens. Besides I know you’re an athlete, so you rarely get to let loose. What better time than being reunited with your favorite friends?” Makki reasoned and Tooru finally nodded slightly at Matsun before the raven headed towards the kitchen to grab the drinks.

It wouldn’t hurt him to have one tiny drink. Especially since he was still on edge when it came to the whole situation.

It felt too normal, too familiar, too good to be true. Because the last time they hung out like this was back before the breakup and although it felt the same as back then, ultimately it wasn’t. He could no longer lean in on Iwaizumi as they watched the movie or talk about ideal things as they ate dinner. He couldn’t even look at the man more than five seconds without thinking about how much things were different. But despite everything, he figured he was the one that wanted to mend the little relationship they had left, if only for their friends’ sake. And the only way of doing it was to endure the uncomfortable moments.  

“You aren’t my favorite friends.” He managed to mumble when Hanamaki smiled in triumph as Oikawa was handed the beer.

“Hmph, keep telling yourself that.” Makki teased, “You might be the famous volleyball player with your other friends, but we’ll always be the one that tolerated you acting like a whiny little brat that couldn’t keep a girlfriend more than a month back in high school.”

Oikawa shot his friend a glare before giving him the finger. He would’ve given the other a smack, but Iwaizumi still divided them, and he didn’t want to lean over to do it. Regardless, he watched as Makki simply laughed at the gesture and went back to figuring out what they were going to watch.

As they continued to browse through the different movies, the doorbell eventually rang, and Iwaizumi rose to answer it. Oikawa couldn’t see the front door from the living room, but he could hear the conversation, which wouldn’t have been all that interesting if Iwaizumi didn’t know the delivery man.

“Hey, man. It’s been a long time.” He heard the voice say.

“Yeah, too long. How’s school? Are you still in law?” Iwaizumi asked, and Oikawa could tell he was smiling as he spoke. They must be friends.

“Yeah, and it’s brutal. I have no time for anything other than studying and work. My girl even broke up with me cause I couldn’t spend time with her.” The man said. “Anyways it’d be 3180 yen for the pizzas.”

Oikawa heard some ruffling before Iwaizumi spoke again. “Sorry, give me a second, I think I might need to grab some change.”

Tooru wasn’t sure why but upon hearing the words he stood and walked towards the door, turning to corner to see Iwaizumi digging through his wallet to get the change. He walked up behind the pair and smiled as he caught sight of the man in the doorway.

He was tall, with black hair that was mostly covered by a hat with the pizza company’s logo on the front. He smiled politely as he noticed Tooru and Iwaizumi turned around to see Oikawa pull out his wallet.

“How much do you need?” The brunette asked.

“Just 180.” The pizza man said, and Oikawa pulled out 500 yen and handed it to the man. “Keep the change.”

“Thanks.” He said before pulling out the pizza from his bag and handing it to the pair. “You’re Iwaizumi’s friend?”

“Yeah, we went to school together when we were younger.” Tooru nodded.

“Ohh, you go to school around here?”

“I go to Tokyo university too, but I never have much time to hangout with anyone.”

“I know the feeling.” He said as he nodded in understanding and shifted his attention back to Iwaizumi. “How’s Misaki? You two still going strong?”

The question made Oikawa’s stomach drop but nonetheless he listened intently. “Yeah, we’re good.”

“Are you planning to move in together after graduation?”

“It depends on how close work is from his school. He still has a few years before he graduates, and it wouldn’t be worth it to move in if he needs to drive halfway across the city every morning.”

“Well, you guy will figure it out.” The man said as he zipped up his bag. “Anyways I should probably get going, I have a few more deliveries. Nice meeting you…”

“Oikawa.” The setter spoke up. “Oikawa Tooru.”

“Nice meeting you Oikawa, I’m Fujimura Makoto.” He said, smiling as his gaze lingered on the setter. “I’ll see you guys around.”

“Bye.”

Once the door was closed Iwaizumi walked towards the kitchen and placed the pizza down on the counter. Tooru silently followed behind, doing the same with the other box before looking over to the raven.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.” The brunette said as he watched the shorter man pull out a few plates from the cupboards.

“No, it’s fine. I wasn’t bothered.” Iwaizumi said as he rummaged through the fridge for something.

“So, after you graduate you’re staying in Tokyo?” Oikawa questioned lightly as to not provoke the other. He didn’t want Hajime to explode like he had the last few times they had spoken.

“Yeah, but I haven’t told my parents yet. I’m not sure if they’d like that.” Iwaizumi answered honestly.

“They’ll be proud of you regardless of whether you go back to Miyagi or not.” Oikawa said as he took one of the plates and placed a few slices on it. “You know that.”

Nodding, Iwaizumi finally closed the fridge and looked at Tooru. “I know.”

“You should also know I’m happy that things are working out for you, right Iwa-chan?” Oikawa continued. Iwaizumi seemed taken back at the comment but before he had the chance to respond Matsukawa and Hanamaki stumbled into the kitchen.

“Finally, the pizza’s here.” Matsukawa said as he grabbed a plate, oblivious to the conversation he had interrupted. “Let’s eat.”

Unfortunately, the conversation ended there, and Oikawa missed the way Iwaizumi’s fist clenched as he heard the comment. The way his heart skipped a beat as recognized the familiar nickname. The way he gritted his teeth as he ignored the feelings that still haunted him. He figured it wouldn’t be easy to get over someone that always been by his side, but after a year apart he knew despite what he liked to tell himself, he still _lov-_

_No._

He wasn't in love with Tooru. He used to love him. But even still, that love hadn't been enough to make him stay. The moment they started to fall apart Oikawa ran to someone else. And not just anyone, but someone Iwaizumi wouldn't even think Tooru would be interested in.

But then again, the brunette always _did_ have a thing for volleyball players.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,  
> I am so sorry it took so long to update this story. Truly I appreciate those readers that have commented and left kudos, and I feel bad that I didn't update sooner. Anyways enjoy the chapter, and feel free to leave a comment on what you thought about it.

As much as Oikawa tended to think of himself as a reasonable person, he knew the thoughts that bubbled up upon hearing his ex-boyfriend intended to move in with his new lover were anything but that. But then again, Iwaizumi had always been an exception in Tooru's life. He had been the one to push Oikawa to do things he never dreamed of.

When the setter had been uncertain about moving away from Miyagi for school, Iwaizumi had wholeheartedly reassured him that they would be okay. When he had worried about failing his classes during their first year of university, Hajime had stayed up and helped him cram for his finals, despite having his own to worry about. But now, as he thought of Iwaizumi moving in with someone else, it scared Tooru more than he liked to admit.

Maybe it was because Oikawa knew signing a lease meant the raven was committed to staying with his current boyfriend for a long time, and the revelation reminded the setter he was no longer in the picture. He was the past, and Misaki was Iwaizumi's future. It hurt more than anything to come to terms with the thought, if that was even possible, but Oikawa didn't dwell on it as he walked out of the kitchen to settle himself on the couch, chewing on a piece of pizza.

"We picked a movie." Matsukawa said as they all settled themselves on the couch, Iwaizumi sitting on Matsukawa's left with Hanamaki on his right, and Oikawa on the far end next to Makki. He was glad he wasn't seated next to the raven again, knowing that he couldn't pretend he was alright with the news he had just been dealt. Sure he was happy for Iwaizumi. Of course he was, he only wished the best for Hajime. But that didn't mean he would pretend he was alright with hearing his ex was thinking of moving in with his new boyfriend.

Especially since when he looked back at their relationship Iwaizumi had always hesitated in taking the next step. Even when it came to getting together.

* * *

Once Oikawa had learned Iwaizumi was interested in guys it had taken him some time to come to terms with the admission. Why hadn't the raven ever mentioned anything earlier? Did he think Tooru wouldn't understand or accept him? Did he not trust him? Oikawa wasn't sure but it bothered him to think that Iwaizumi kept something so personal to himself.

But then again he figured he had no right to complain since he hadn't said anything about his own interests yet. He had wanted to, of course he had, but there was small part of him that didn't want to tell Iwaizumi for fear of the other completely rejecting him. Looking back he was stupid to even entertain such a thought. This was Iwaizumi he was taking about. Someone that had never judged him when he had an obsession with aliens when they were kids, or when he had irrational fears of not being good enough back in middle school. Iwaizumi had always accepted, and tried to understand him, why would that change now?

"Natsuki-senpai said he was having a party this weekend, are you going?" Makki spoke and snapped Tooru out of his earlier thought. They sat together outside on a bench, with Iwaizumi and Oikawa on one side, and Hanamaki and Matsukawa on the other as they ate their lunches.

"Yeah I think so." Iwaizumi said and Oikawa rose a curious eyebrow at the comment.

"Since when did you go to parties Iwa-chan?"

"Do I need a reason to go to a senpai's party?" The raven snapped back as he glared at the other. "He was nice enough to invite us. Besides they'll graduate soon and leave the team to us."

"Hmm, that's true." Oikawa nodded, knowing that Natsuki-senpai and the rest of the third years were heading off to college soon and if Tooru was being honest he would miss them. Despite being a talented player coming into high school, his seniors in the club had definitely helped him grow and become stronger as the years went on and he felt almost sad knowing he would be a third year next year with anyone there to give him guidance when he needed it. "I was planning on going too. How about you two?"

"Yeah." Hanamaki responded as Matssun nodded before the raven turned to Hajime.

"I heard Watabe Hiyori's going." Matsukawa said as he continued to eat. "She's interested in you right?"

"Ahh, yeah." Iwaizumi nodded, looking down at his lunch instead of his friends. "She hasn't confessed but she's been texting me for a bit now."

This was news to Oikawa as he heard the admission. Of course he knew more than a few girls were interested in Iwaizumi, but since Iwaizumi's last break up he hadn't even mentioned anything about a relationship. And once Oikawa found out the other swung both ways he had figured Hajime must have a crush on some guy and that was why he didn't jump into another relationship.

Clearly that didn't seem like the case.

"Hmm, that's great Iwa-chan." Oikawa smiled widely that came off more fake than he intended up it was better than showing his real emotions on the topic. "Maybe you guys can hook up at the party?"

"Shut up, idiot, I wouldn't move that fast." The raven said as he heard the teasing words.

"Ohh, and here I thought Iwa-chan would finally lose his virginity." The setter continued to tease, but the moment he said the words he could clearly see he had gone too far. He saw the way Iwaizumi's shoulders stiffened as he heard the comment and Tooru waited for the other to start insulting him like usual.

"Have you?"

"What?" Oikawa blinked as he heard the question.

"Have you lost your virginity yet?" Iwaizumi asked as he looked up from his food, eyes serious, almost cold as he looked at Tooru.

"Of course." Oikawa lied effortlessly as he continued to eat, wanting the subject to change as soon as possible. "I mean, it wasn't that big of a deal."

"You have?" Hanamaki asked, surprised as he looked around the table to land on Matsukawa who seemed uninterested in the conversation. "Have you?"

"Yeah." The tall raven said, not bothering to pause from eating. "With my last girlfriend."

The confession didn't surprise Oikawa as he always figured Matsukawa wouldn't think sex was a big deal. He always seemed to go with flow and let things happen, Oikawa figured he was the same when it came to his relationships.

"Me too." Another voice spoke up and Tooru froze as he heard the confession from the last person he expected. "With my last girlfriend."

"What?!" Makki asked, clearly shocked at the revelation his three best friends had already had sex. "You too Iwaizumi."

"With your last girlfriend?" Oikawa asked, tilting his head questioningly. "Why didn't you ever say anything?"

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" Iwaizumi shot back, pointing out the setter had done the same thing to him and Tooru resisted the urge to say it was because he hadn't actually had sex yet. Instead he backed down from prying further, knowing questioning the other now would get him no where.

When they were alone he would ask about it.

"Right." Was all Oikawa said as they shifted their conversation to elsewhere.

* * *

Oikawa frowned as shifted in his spot, trying to find a more comfortable position but after a few moments of trying he eventually gave up, as he slowly opened his eyes. It took him a few moments to realize he wasn't in his bed, or his apartment, and as he spotted a familiar spikey haired raven walk into the room he soon remember where he was.

"Where did Matssun and Makki go?" Oikawa asked from his spot on the couch, as he felt his head spinning, clearly from the amount of beers he had consumed earlier. He vaguely recalled going through a few more beers as the movie went on and before he knew it he felt his eyelids slowly closing. He even remembered dreaming about something. He tried to remember what that was, but the harder he thought the more he felt dizzy, eventually giving up in the end.

"They just left after the movie finished. You fell asleep."

"Sorry."

"Long day?" Iwaizumi asked as he began to clean up the living room, picking up the plates and empty bottles they had left on the table.

"Yeah." Oikawa answered, noting the way his heart sped up as he realized he was finally alone with Iwaizumi. "I should probably get going though."

He groaned as he stood quickly, trying his best to ignore the way his head felt too dizzy to take a few steps, much less drive himself home. However as he stumbled he could feel himself lose balance and he shut his eyes as he tried to brace the fall. Fortunately the impact never came. Unfortunately, the person to save him was Iwaizumi.

The arms around his body kept him from falling and Oikawa looked up to see dark eyes staring down at him.

"Sorry." Oikawa said as he stood, knowing the hand around his waist was nothing more than support. "I—I'm going."

"Not unless you call a cab." Iwaizumi answered, letting go of the other as he stepped back to take in Oikawa's state. He could tell from the way the other swayed when he stood, and the tired look on Tooru's face that the volleyball player was drunk. And there was no way he was going to let the idiot try to get home by himself, especially since he promised Matsukawa and Hanamaki he would deal with Oikawa, so they didn't have to worry.

Looking back he somewhat regretted it, but he wasn't a heartless asshole and he knew letting the brunette stay one night wouldn't be that big of a deal. Especially since Oikawa probably wouldn't remember anything in the morning.

"You're sleeping here tonight."

"No, I'll call a cab." Oikawa said as he pulled out his phone to make the call, unfortunately he quickly realized it was dead and almost cursed at his bad luck. "Could I borrow your phone?"

"You're staying here. It'll be easier, once you wake up in the morning you can drive home. There's no point in cabbing home just to come back to pick up your car tomorrow." Iwaizumi explained.

"No—"

"I'm not taking no for an answer." Iwaizumi insisted as he turned to head and started walking down the hall to his bedroom. "Let's get you something to wear."

Oikawa stood silently in the living room for a few moments before he followed behind the raven apprehensively. He knew there was nothing he could do but accept the other's kind offer but he couldn't help but feel out of place. Especially since they were alone.

He almost laughed at how ironic the thought was, since he never believed Iwaizumi of all people would be someone he felt uncomfortable around, but Oikawa guessed that was part of life. One moment you could be inseparable and wholeheartedly comfortable with a person, and the next you could be strangers.

It wasn't like Oikawa hadn't experienced such instances in the past. Sure, back in elementary school he had had friends that he promised he would stay friends with forever and now he could hardly remember their names, much less their faces, but he knew that was different from now. Because unlike those friends that drifted away from him as they got older, Iwaizumi had only grown closer.

It was a pity that was no longer true.

As he entered the room he noted the decently sized bed in the middle of the room, with a small bedside table next to it. There was a large dresser on the opposite side of room and a door that most likely lead to a closest. As he looked over the room he could tell that although the place was relatively clean, he did note a few articles of clothing scatter around the room and suppressed a fond smile at the sight. Iwaizumi always did have a habit of leaving his clothes on the floor after a long day.

"Sorry, I didn't clean up." Iwaizumi said, and Oikawa took a cautious step into the room.

"It's alright. It's nothing I haven't seen before."

"Right." Iwaizumi responded after a few seconds of silence before he disregarded the comment as he rummaged through his dresser to find some clothes for the volleyball player. They were around the same size, but Iwaizumi had broader shoulders and larger arms. In comparison, Oikawa was a little more lanky and Iwaizumi vaguely recalled that when Oikawa used to wear his shirts they would always be slightly big.

"Here, wear this." He said as he pulled out a random pair of pajama bottoms and tossed it to the brunette as he closed the drawer to look for a shirt. "Lemme, get you a shirt."

"You still have this?" Oikawa asked and Iwaizumi froze as he turned to see the brunette pick up an article of clothing from the floor. The shirt was worn, and clearly old, but they both knew it was something Iwaizumi would never throw away.

The setter slowly lifted the shirt up to get a better look and he smiled fondly as he read the name printed on the back.

"Of course, did you throw out yours?" The raven questioned as he ignored the look Oikawa was giving the old jersey. Why would the idiot care about his old team uniform?

"I mean- you still wear it?" Oikawa clarified as he finally looked up from the shirt. "It still fits?"

"No, Misaki wears-" Iwaizumi instinctively said as he tried to defend himself. Unfortunately, from the way Oikawa furrowed his eyebrows and frowned at the comment he stopped himself from finishing, pausing awkwardly before he spoke up again. "He likes to wear it."

"Of course, that makes sense." Iwaizumi knew that was probably the wrong thing to say from the way Oikawa merely placed the shirt on the bed after speaking and headed to the doors. "I should be alright with the shirt I'm wearing, you don't need to worry about it anymore."

Now, as much as Hajime knew he could be dense, it was glaringly obvious that he had bothered Tooru with his earlier words. And even though he thought he would have reveled in the hurt look Oikawa had shown, all he was left with was an odd sense of guilt, which didn't sit well with him.

Why did he feel bad about talking about his boyfriend? More importantly, why did Oikawa have the nerve to pretend to look bothered? Had he ever cared?

Sighing, the raven decided it was better not to think about such things when he was tipsy and more than a little willing to slam Oikawa against the nearest wall and demand him to answer his questions. Instead, he simply pulled out the extra blankets from his closet and headed back into the living room where Oikawa was seated on the couch.

"Here." He said as he handed the other the blankets.

"Do you have a charger I can borrow?" The brunette asked as he held up his dead phone. "I don't have practice tomorrow, but just in case someone calls me..."

"I only have mine, but my phone's about to die too." Iwaizumi answered, feeling slightly bad about the other not having any way of contacting anyone. "I'm not going to bed yet though, you could borrow until then, let me grab-"

"No, you don't need to do that." Oikawa insisted. "I'm heading to bed too, just charge it until you need to use it. I probably won't need it until tomorrow, so just leave it next to your charger or something."

"You sure? You don't need to text or call anyone?" Iwaizumi asked, knowing the question sounded more nosy than he intended but brushing it off as he noted Oikawa didn't seem to care.

"No."

"Alright then, good night. I'll let you change." The raven said as he exited the room, entering his bedroom a few seconds later to plug in the dead phone and get ready for bed. He ignored the thought that his ex-boyfriend was changing much less sleeping in the next room as he brushed his teeth, knowing he was making a bigger deal out of the situation than he should, but nonetheless he couldn't help feel uneasy.

As he finished up in the washroom he reentered his room and slipped into a pair of sweatpants, stripping out of his shirt and sliding under the other covers. As he pulled out his phone and idly scrolled through his social media accounts he heard a buzz from his bedside table and watched as the dead phone lit up. He spared a glance at the phone before he went back to his phone, soon getting bored of scrolling mindlessly through the different posts.

Maybe he should head to bed?

Sighing, Iwaizumi placed his phone on the bedside table, next to Oikawa's as he picked up the other's phone to see how much it had charged. He wasn't surprised when he saw that the battery had charged 6% and knew that he should at least let it charge for a little longer. He figured he could watch a few videos on his phone as he waited before he retired for the night and as Hajime was about to place the phone back down a thought popped into his head that seemed like a good idea at the time but looking back he had been completely idiotic to everything think so.

 _Did Oikawa still have the same password?_ He wondered as he looked at the keypad and quickly typed in the four digit password he remembered Tooru having. Surprisingly as he tapped the last number he was greeted with the phone unlocking and a picture of Oikawa smiling back at him.

The picture took him off guard, especially since he hadn't seen that smile directed towards him in a long time, but he immediately disregarded it as he knew what he was doing was a bad idea. He should've just locked the phone and pretended nothing had happened, but unfortunately before he knew he swiped left to see another picture of Oikawa smiling, this time in a slightly different pose, but clearly they were taken seconds apart.

He almost rolled his eyes as he continued to scroll through the others pictures to see another ten more selfies but eventually he stopped when he finally reached a different photo. It was with Oikawa and a group of people smiling as they held either solo cups or beers in their hands. Clearly the picture was taken at a party from time signature at the top and Iwaizumi took the time to see if he recognized anyone. He vaguely recalled a few of Oikawa's teammates but for the most part, including all of the girls, he didn't know anyone. He figured they were probably either random strangers or girlfriends of some of Tooru's teammates.

After a few minutes of staring at the picture he moved on, scrolling through a few more pictures of the same party before he was greeted with a picture of what looked like notes. He stopped as he looked down to the bottom of the screen and noted that in the scroll bar there was at least ten more pictures of notes. Swiping down he was brought to all of Oikawa's pictures and instictively scrolled up to see how far back the notes went.

Unsurprisingly there were at least a hundred pictures of different notes, mostly like from different classes, and Iwaizumi eventually stopped when he had gone far back enough to see actual pictures again. He noted the pictures were from Christmas when Oikawa had gone back home to visit his family. Iwaizumi hadn't seen the brunette when the raven had visited his parents, but he figured they were probably both avoiding one another. Besides Hajime hadn't had much time to spend time with anyone other than his family so it was expected he wouldn't see Tooru.

He smiled however when he saw the family pictures with Oikawa and his family. Despite his breakup with Tooru he was still fond of the Oikawa family and he was glad to see they were doing alright. Even Takeru seemed to have grown a little since he had last seen him.

Iwaizumi mindlessly continued to scroll, seeing that although Tooru seemed to have many pictures, most of them were volleyball or school related. He saw a few pictures of Oikawa with his teammates during practice, or during their training camp they had every November but to his surprise there wasn't much of anything else. And as the photo's grew older Iwaizumi wondered just how far back they went.

At the thought he swiped down to scroll back towards the earliest pictures and as he saw the pictures pass him by he immediately stopped as his eyes recognized someone.

Him.

He froze as he noted it was picture that had been taken at the beginning of last year, before everything had begun to fall apart, and as he noted the way he smiled behind Tooru in the bathroom mirror, he wondered if he had any idea back then how things would eventually turn out. Probably not, from the way he endearingly seemed to wrap his arms around the volleyball players waist, who was wearing nothing but his shirt. That hadn't been an uncommon thing, Tooru in his shirt, especially since the brunette claimed he liked wearing it after they had sex, but now it bothered him to see any reminder of their relationship.

After a minute or so he scrolled through the other pictures, noting that every few included him and the more he saw, the more he became irritated. He hated looking back at how things had been, because now these pictures- memories- held something different. They weren't of a couple madly in love with one another. They were of him foolishly falling for someone that had just been playing around.

Eventually he grew tired of looking at the old pictures, having seen all of them before, and exited out of the pictures, to see the albums. He noted their were a few that Oikawa had labelled but the one that caught his eye was the one named Hidden.

Now, Iwaizumi knew better than to look through someone else's things, especially when it was labelled Hidden, but before his conscious could advice him otherwise he was clicking on the album to see the contents. Besides, it wasn't like Iwaizumi hadn't gone through Tooru's phone before. Back when they were together Oikawa had been pretty open with letting him use his phone, and vice versa. Maybe in a new relationship such things were considered an invasion of privacy, but considering they knew almost everything about each other Iwaizumi hadn't thought it was odd.

However he knew back then was clearly different from now. Back then they had trusted one another, more than anyone else, but now? Iwaizumi wasn't even sure Oikawa could hold a conversation with him more than five minutes. Nonetheless, he had already opened the album, as he was greeted with different pictures of people, men and women alike, in various states of nakedness.

It took Iwaizumi a few seconds to realize the album was Tooru's porn stash and he couldn't help but feel slightly embarrassed as he scrolled through the pictures. Most of them were pretty conservative, with the men being shirtless and the women wearing bikinis or lingerie. Hajime noted that most of the women seemed to have thin bodies, long hair and large breast, which Iwaizumi figured must've been the other's type. On the other hand the men tended to be tanned, with toned muscles and short hair. He frowned as he thought about what that meant and simply continued to scroll.

After getting over his initial embarrassment he didn't feel all that surprised that Oikawa had these pictures, but as he scrolled he stopped once again as he caught a picture of what clearly looked like Oikawa. He swallowed as he stopped to click on the picture, soon realizing it wasn't a picture, but instead a video. And as he pressed play he couldn't help but sit their speechless as he watched the video.

Oikawa was on his knees on the floor, looking up at the camera as he sucked off the guy in the video. He licked and sucked eagerly as the hand in his hair pushed in further down on the man's cock.

"Please." Tooru moaned as he blew the man, cheeks red as he looked up desperately at the camera.

"Please what?"

"Please, fuck me." Oikawa managed as he continued to suck the man off. "Iwa-chan, fuck me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? I hope it wasn't too confusing with me going back and forth from past to present. Anyways thank you for reading. Until next time.

**Author's Note:**

> It's my first time writing a fanfiction for the Haikyuu fandom but I love this pairing too much. Please feel free to leave me a kudo and a comment if you liked it!


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